Thursday, March 31, 2011

omeyy nyee

alolo, and if the baby is
girl I would name her
maryam.
haha.

poem is love

“We could start with the acceptable places, the bathroom, the coffee shop, the library. Where you can stall and read the paper, where you can get your caffeine fix and sit and stay there. Where you can browse the stacks and smell the books. You’re not supposed to talk much anyway so it’s safe there. There’s also the gym. If you’re shy you could hang out with yourself in mirrors, you could put headphones in. And there’s public transportation, because we all gotta go places. And there’s prayer and meditation. No one will think less if you’re hanging with your breath seeking peace and salvation. Things you may have previously avoided based on your avoid-being-alone principals.

Society is afraid of alonedom, like lonely hearts are wasting away in basements. Like people must have problems if, after a while, nobody is dating them. But lonely is a freedom that breathes easy and weightless and lonely is healing if you make it.Perhaps in the interest of loving oneself, perhaps all those sappy slogans from preschool over to high school’s groaning were tokens for holding the lonely at bay. Because if you’re happy in your head then solitude is blessed and alone is okay.

And it doesn’t mean you’re not connected, that community’s not present, just take the perspective you get from being one person in one head and feel the effects of it. Take silence and respect it. If you have an art that needs a practice, stop neglecting it. If your family doesn’t get you, or religious sect is not meant for you, don’t obsess about it.

You could be in an instant surrounded if you needed it.
If your heart is bleeding make the best of it."

HOW TO BE ALONE a poem by Tanya Davis

eh manaa?

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.
manaa weh, manaa? T_T

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

second chance is not a fairytale

I remember last time
when god gives me
a second chance just to
breath again.
That night I was sitting alone
in my ward. All I remember
it was a cold and dark night.
doctor told me that i was
suspected of having
severe acute respiratory syndrome.
after a week of treatment
I thank God because He really loves
me. I cured.
I remember last time,
when I left him with
question marks in his mind
Taut of going to enjoy life to
the fullest. to meet many guys.
To not to be so serious
at young age.
But I was wrong. seems like
he is the best guy I ever met.
He's my number one guy sortaa
like that :D hmm.
whatever it is.
Appreciate the second chance that was
given to you because u deserved it
sometimes. (:

is it me or they?




Jessie Ware & Sampha - Valentine

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

baby kienaa rshn dan lain lain.

Roight. see that girl beside me.
she is one of the prettiest fghiend
I ever had. (:
that day was fun. it was a blast :D
thanks for the day kiena.
dia ni kaki shopping. haha.
next trip we go shopping together haa,
time nak ada apa festive ke.
what I like about her is
kami macam satu kepala
ahh. since kocik la. satu sekolah.
she even has her own nick kami panggil
sumpah comel that nick. kann kann. HAHA
okay la, bottom line is,
had a ghreat time hari tu.
went out with classmates
guys are naz khai n lah,
girl2 maryam n ummul.
and rusy ! dang tiba2
jumpa tepi jalan depan kedai. HAHA.
friendship is something phrecious :D

Sunday, March 27, 2011

I fall in love

hisyam.

I fall in love with you all over again.
let's have some fun.
come flirt with me pol pol.
I miss you badly :DD
ohhh ohh,
I love you so much sayang.

Saturday, March 26, 2011

ini kan life yang kau pilih?

cita cita aku mencapah.
kadang rasa nak jadi pembaca berita
tak kurang jugak nak jadi DJ radio.
lepas tu bajet nak try modelling.
nak jadi ahli music nak jadi penyanyi.
pernah rasa nak belajar fashion
jadi macam jimmy choo donna karan
diorg semuaa.
sat lagi nak jadi ahli physics,
kalau kau nak tahu aku paling minat
matematik. bagi aku equations,
matematik yang macam add math tu.
lepas tu karang nak jadi peramugari,
eh tak la, sekali sekala
pun ada rasa nak jadi dentist.
tapi dalam hati yang paling dalam aku
selalu nak jadi pilot. haha. gelak la.
cita cita aku apa kau kesah?
aku rasa mesti best dapat jalan atas awan.
sumpah cool gila.
eheem tapi itu lah.
apa kita lalu sekarang layan kan je lah,
seronok ke tak kita punya cerita.
kita punya life. nak buat macam mana.
pernah rasa menyesal dalam decision
dalam life? tak apa. bad decision,
that's alright kan? (:
apa fikir? larung je la. this is my silly life :D


p/s: nak dapat four flat dengan
course yang tak masuk dengan kau?
ahh, mimpi dulu la brotha. haha.
lain lah kau mmg genius, gifted :)

Thursday, March 24, 2011

baby baru lah sial

babi babi babi.
cantik tak?
ahhhh, aku tau cantik.
kenalkan ni baby baru I.
HAHAHA,
aummm auuummm
:DD

Pink (P!nk) - Fuckin' Perfect (Music Video) HQ [2011 *NEW*]



Made a wrong turn
Once or twice
Dug my way out
Blood and fire
Bad decisions
That’s alright
Welcome to my silly life
Mistreated, misplaced, missundaztood
Miss “no way it’s all good”
It didn’t slow me down
Mistaken
Always second guessing
Underestimated
Look, I’m still around…

Pretty, pretty please
Don’t you ever, ever feel
Like your less than
Fuckin’ perfect
Pretty, pretty please
If you ever, ever feel
Like your nothing
You’re fuckin’ perfect to me

You’re so mean
When you talk
About yourself
You are wrong
Change the voices
In your head
Make them like you
Instead
So complicated
Look how big you’ll make it
Filled with so much hatred
Such a tired game
It’s enough
I’ve done all i can think of
Chased down all my demons
see you same

Pretty, pretty please
Don’t you ever, ever feel
Like your less than
Fuckin’ perfect
Pretty, pretty please
If you ever, ever feel
Like your nothing

You’re fuckin’ perfect to me
The world stares while i swallow the fear
The only thing i should be drinking is an ice cold beer
So cool in lying and I tried tried
But we try too hard, it’s a waste of my time
Done looking for the critics, cuz they’re everywhere
They don’t like my genes, they don’t get my hair
Stringe ourselves and we do it all the time
Why do we do that?
Why do I do that?
Why do I do that?

Ooh, pretty pretty pretty,
Pretty pretty please don’t you ever ever feel
Like you’re less then, fuckin’ perfect
Pretty pretty please if you ever ever feel
Like you’re nothing you’re fuckin’ perfect, to me
You’re perfect
You’re perfect
Pretty, pretty please don’t you ever ever feel like you’re less then, fucking perfect
Pretty, pretty please if you ever ever feel like you’re nothing you’re fucking perfect to me

i dont have any problem

sure.
I have no problem
handling all those problems
you pointed to me.
Pleasure is mine.
Anyone wants to add up moree?
Please do so,
because my own problem
is still not that many,
enlighten me.
I feel fucktard awesome ! :D

sakit tak habis :(

aaaaaa. kaki sakit lagi.
macam manaa?
stress la macam ni -.-

i don't care a shit

I post what I like. mind you, this is my territory

tak boleh ke banyak lagi benda kau nak pointed kat aku?
kau nak blame aku kau nak geram kat aku.
pernah aku kacau life kau pernah aku tegur kau?
bukan nya cara kau tak elok tapi lama sangat kau simpan
apesal tak on the spot hari aku buat kesalahan
babi gampang besar tu kau cakap? eh, kau bukan kenal aku hari ni tau.
bukan kau kenal aku dalam aku state babi sumpah aku baik gila
pakai tudung mulut baik sopan santun apaa semua mcm budak perempuan lain.
dengar sini, kau tak boleh accept siapa aku itu bukan persoalan aku.
masalah kau. sebab aku tak pernah kacau hidup kau pun,
tak pernah. kau sayang aku sebab tu kau tegur.
sukahati lah. lepas tu aku yang patut pujuk kau merajuk?
nak menyentap. brotha, i was there for you. in your deepest tears.
NO YOU DON'T REMEMBER..
sukaaa hati kau la. aku bukan nak mengungkit
tapi aku pelik, aku buat kerja off campus.
I know person who can be trusted,
but i was fucking shit wrong !
iyaaa. sukahati kau la lepas ni nak canang cerita pasal aku
terima kasih la banyak banyak.
terima kasih tak terhingga. sebab aku tak pernah kacau life kau.
tak pernah kut. aku support apa kau nak buat iya lah.
ikut kau lah. apa kau rasa best. kau ada mulut, kau ada mata pandai2 la.

people telling us to be ourself yet they JUDGE us. watafak?
so keep on pretending bastards! people judge.
they see what they want to see.
oh, seingat aku kau memang bagus pun.
tak ada flaw. flawless. thank you.

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

dinner la apa lagi :D

coursemates dinner.
theme: celebrity
venue: grand paragon hotel jb

This is my fav pic :D

my gorgeous seniors :D

Next fav picturee :D

:DD credit to asyraf for the specs

my preghtty seniors :D

Monday, March 21, 2011

explaining is the hardest part

I was about to explain everything.
Then you leave me with broken hearted.
thank you very much.
It feels so good :)
I wish you would listen,
but you give me
no room for explanation.
thank you very very much :(

i was wrong

i taut you are the
coolest guy i ever met.
but i was wrong

i feel bad

by the time i write this entry.
everyone should know that I am in the deep tears.
i feel fucked up.
valkyrie is my team
u guys r no longer valkyrie
u guys needs 2 find another identity
tell them dat will u
i jz hope u guys d best
in everytg.

obviously he don't care about us anymore.
I feel like quiting. but he said, the game is
just started, no need to quit.
tak tahu la. aku speechless habis.
tak ada words boleh keluar.
tak tahu nak cakap macam mana.
semuaaa mixed emotions.
rasa nak buat macam macam.
I NEED A SHOULDER TO CRY ON please, :(

Sunday, March 20, 2011

The Wanted - All Time Low (Official)




Praying won't do it
Hating won't do it
Drinking won't do it
Fighting won't knock you out of my head

Hiding won't hide it
Smiling won't hide it
Like I ain't tried it
Everyone's tried it now and failed somehow

So when you gonna let me
When you gonna let me out, out?

And if you know
How do you get up from an all time low?
I'm in pieces, seems like peace is the only thing I'll never know
How do you get out, get out?

'Cause driving won't do it
Flying won't do it
Denying won't do it
Crying won't drown it out, what you said

When I'm standing on the yellow line, waiting at the station
Or I'm late for work, a vital presentation
If you call me now girl without reservation
I would try to break through

But if you know
How do you get up from an all time low?
I'm in pieces, seems like peace is the only thing I'll never know
How do you get up from an all time low?

I can't even find a place to start
How do I choose between my head and heart?
'Til it ceases, I'll never know
How do you get up from an all time low?

A low, a low, a low, a low, a low, a low
Can you hear me?
A low, a low, a low, a low, a low, a low
Can't you hear me?
A low, a low, a low, a low, a low, a low
Can you hear me?
A low, a low, a low, a low, a low, a low

And if you know
How do you get up from an all time low?
I'm in pieces, seems like peace is the only thing I'll never know
How do you get up from an all time low?

I can't even find a place to start
How do I choose between my head and heart
'Til it ceases, I'll never know
How do you get up from an all time low?

I can't even find a place to start
How do I choose between my head and heart
'Til it ceases, I'll never know
How do you get up from an all time low?

Thursday, March 17, 2011

rango rango

sometimes in a moment
you really need
a space a time
for your own self.
spending time alone wud be the best.
ohoh.
watching movie alone does not consider
as a loser. instead it is fun.
sumpah tak tipu.
I watched 3 movies so far
alone. quarantine, bed time stories and
recently rango. (:
best kot. tenang.
no conversation, tak buat apa thinking pun.
just you yourself.
bila kau rasa fucked up and giving up on hopes
benda paling senang is turn to GOD.
next come all those good things yang kau
rasa boleh bikin hati and tenang.
rileks la. life ni fun.
:D
tak ada pressure pun.
kita orang je yang buat buat dia
konon konon pressure.
rango teaches me one thing
"NO MAN CAN WALK OUT FROM HIS OWN STORY"
fahimtum tum? haha

metafora

metaphor:

asap rokok
tak kan sampai
ke smoke detector
selagi mana dia(smoke detector)
berada di berdekatan
kipas siling.
faham tak?

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

do you remember me? like seriously,

I WAS THERE FOR YOU. remember that :)

I tend to remember easily
almost every single thing
that you've said.


to a friend i trust most

As we sit beneath the stars.
You buried with silence.
I've told you most of my secrets.
You listen to every and each word of mine.
Thanks for simply being there.
Not that I trust u with all my heart
but I know all those things I've been telling
you'll keep it to yourself.
As I will never find any objection
if you telling any of my secrets to anyone.
Because in you I trusted most.
Thank you very much.
I wasted most of your time by spending
it to listen to my silly stories.
thank you buddy.
u mean a lot to me (:
but up till now, I will never understand this
one line of yours,
"bodoh dia tinggalkan kau nis,"
behind this line, there's one thing I can tell you
that I am not perfect. neither anyone has.

I know it sounds pathetic but I really like to repeat it many times

and so he goes again.
every night sleeping at his study table.
while I am here waiting for him to reply my text
or even to call me every night saying good night to me.
but well, live as we know it. accept everything.
I know it sounds pathetic.
wanting this and that and so on.
whatever. sure thing. I will not be selfish myself.
hmm. polpol, miss you much with every heartbeat.
again, does it sounds pathetic? haha.
eh eh, sukahati aku la. aku nak tulis apa. -..-
haha. iya lah, I'll wait for you like forever.
I wish forever is real. time is ticking fast.
please I need to be yours cepat cepat.
not that aku dah menggatal nak kahwin.
but I think it'd be fun having a life-partner.
haha. gila dah ni.
I miss you badly. funny how we can stay strong
until this moment of time.
I think it is all because I fall for you like many times.
lebiu much ohokay? :D

Saturday, March 12, 2011

basketball diaries

okay. it's been month i rest from any sports.
no weight gain for sure, instead i lose some weight (:
oh well that's not the point.
went to court hoping that I can still run.
doing some running and playing one quarter of the game.
It was a bliss. I swear.
It was a total relief and all those pain and tiredness washed away.
seriously.
running is something i need to flirt with again. please baby.
I need you to play my sport.
I need my ankle to be fine. to run fast and to do anything.
wohoo. I won't stop hoping. fuck la if still hurting then I can't play.
They tell me to rest. but you know, a month of resting feels like a year.
-.-' but then I don't want to be handicap for my entire life. haa.
'cuba jgn degil?'

lagi satu.
Wanting to dismiss our basketball coach for his coach’s job,
simply because of its anonymity,
is the quickest and most obvious solution. It’s also wrong.
en hariz yacob,
tribute to you.
no matter how hard and how loud u screamed in my face,
I really need you to be a part of Valkyrie. seriously.
thanks for everything. thanks a million.
for every single thing.
every problem ends with a solution, coach
trust me.

erti setiap kata itu

hikmah suara simpan di hati
kalau semua termengerti
jadi lah dunia ini tiada erti
apa difikirkan perlu berhati hati
usah luah jika tidak bererti.
bila mana sampai masa terhenti
bila mana kau penat sendiri
mulut kaku diam berhenti
baru kau mengerti dan sedari
hidup itu rumit untuk dimengerti.


Friday, March 11, 2011

binatang haram lah kau ni

aku fuck anak dara orang tak kacau hidup kau tau.
boleh tak tolong mind your own business?
please la. sumpah aku tak pernah kacau kau.
so jangan kacau life aku boleh?
perangai serupa macam binatang haram.

Thursday, March 10, 2011

I don't like a virgin

In any either way.
life is fucked up.
no one is still a virgin
because life fuck us hard anyway.
no rush. no stress.
just go with the fucking flow.
cheer up mann.
life is simple in any ways.

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

it's your life la

We can't make each and everyone around us
satisfied with what we've done,
what we did, and what are we going to do.
We can't expect everyone to like us.
No, we can't.
Live your own life.
What's the point of trying so hard
to impress others
while the time is ticking & life is leaving us fast?

Sunday, March 6, 2011

a hectic weekend

okay. so weekend spent wisely lah kan
WTF mann? go watch terima kasih cinta theater?
dengar tajuk pun aku rasa macam sweet tak pasal
menggedik boleh bunuh diri lepas tengok.
*first impression*

ni diaa punyaa apaa tu haaa emm banner kot? HAHA.

okay ni tony eusoff. aku rasa x ada org tak kenal dia.
mann, please buat lah love tu comel sikit. HAHA
*psst: dia buff gila weh sampai aku pun cuak berdiri sebelah mamat ni.
aku tinggi kan? nampak tak? HAHA

okay, ada satu cerita. lepak punya lepak sorg sorg
dekat belakang building istana budaya ni.
ceh, bajet rumah sendiri lepak suka hati.
I forgot her name lah, we did chat and lepak lama lah jugak.
but she was one of the DJ from Suria FM.
tolong tell me if anyone knows her. haha.
She's the coolest person I ever met la. best. (:
ni siapaa tak kenal sila bunuh diri,
ehh tak pun kau tak layan cerita industri tanah air.
HAHA. suka hati laa, ni diaa Farahdiya.
once looked macam sombong,
after a chat or maybe a pic together,
she honestly a nice person.
haaa, dia pakai heels tu pasal tinggi sikit.
she's hot ;D
gosh, her performance was great.
norish karman. berganding bersama
abg tony bawak watak isteri yang curang.
eh bukan, isteri yang suami dia busy working
thus dia fall in love dgn org lain.
boleh tak? haha. life kan. no one knows.
tapi she is brilliant la. i admire her much.
tapi weh, aku quite unhappy
tak dapat jumpa aleeya. dia sumpah terbaik jugak.
haha. okay lah
moral of the story.
theater is just a theater until it appears
in our real life.
that will eventually known as experience
in our daily life. take what positive
left what useless. no worries.
Life made easy :)

terima kasih

bukan kasih yang ditagih
jauh sekali belaian mesra
tidak juga perhatian melampau
satu sahaja aku pinta
sayang aku sampai bila mana
hayat mu terhenti.
terima kasih sayang.

Friday, March 4, 2011

lapan bulan dah weh

sayang,

happy eightmonthsarry.
I love you much.
take care there.
(:

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Stone Sour - Through Glass


I'm looking at you through the glass...
Don't know how much time has passed
Oh, god it feels like forever
But no one ever tells you that forever
Feels like home sitting all alone inside your head

How do you feel? That is the question
But I forget.. you don't expect an easy answer
When something like a soul becomes
Initialized and folded up like paper dolls and little notes
You can't expect a bit of hope
So while you're outside looking in
Describing what you see
Remember what you're staring at is me

Cause I'm looking at you through the glass...
Don't know how much time has passed
All I know is that it feels like forever
When no one ever tells you that forever
Feels like home, sitting all alone inside your head

How much is real? So much to question
An epidemic of the mannequins
Contaminating everything
When thought came from the heart
It never did right from the start
Just listen to the noises
(Null and void instead of voices)
Before you tell yourself
It's just a different scene
Remember it's just different from what you've seen

I'm looking at you through the glass...
Don't know how much time has passed
And all I know is that it feels like forever
When no one ever tells you that forever
Feels like home, sitting all alone inside your head

And it's the starrrssss
The sttarrrsss
That shine for you
And it's the starrrssss
The sttarrrsss
That lie to you.. yeah-ah

I'm looking at you through the glass...
Don't know how much time has passed
Oh, god it feels like forever
But no one ever tells you that forever
Feels like home, sitting all alone inside your head

'Cause I'm looking at you through the glass...
Don't know how much time has passed
All I know is that it feels like forever
But no one ever tells you that forever
Feels like home, sitting all alone inside your heaaaaddd

And it's the starrrssss
The sttarrrsss
That shine for you.. yeah-ah
And it's the starrrssss
The sttarrrsss
That lie to you.. yeah-ah

And it's the starrrssss
The sttarrrsss
That shine for you.. yeah-ah
And it's the starrrssss
The sttarrrsss
That lie to you.. yeah-ah yeah

Ohhhoh when the starrs
Ohhh oh when the starrrrs that liieee

<3
forever feels like home
sitting all alone inside your head (:

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

march, be nice please.


hello MARCH.
please be nice or else
I'm gonna fuck you hard.
no funny. I mean it :)

come again? I can't hear you.

She shouldn't
miss you much.
because your ghost
is a total bastard.
one who keeps on hunting
into her very last
soul. She shouldn't
care about it.
but when she said
she don't care.
she really don't mean it.
because somewhere
somehow it must have
been a soul
connection. seriously.

rumit ke life ni?

hallo. it's been a while i haven't write any.
gosh. rasa terbuku buku kat benak ni haa
tak express everything.
well well. macam mana nak start ea?
things been tough recently.
but as i told before,
gelakkan problems tuu diorg jadi
semakin kecil and eventually
hilang. seriously. tak tipu.
let's talk about things that can make us
feel great and to manage stress.
besides praying obviously,
we can do a lot of stuff yang boleh release tension.
we can channel our thoughts and negative feelings to do any
good things, swimming, karaoke-ing,
dance naked, playing video games,
anything lah kann. and hangout with friends :)
and I don't find any objection that
smoking can reduce tension.
seriously I don't.
tak ada apa dah.
life made easy.
ada ada lah, tak ada tak apa kann?
sbb semua benda pun simple
yang buat dia jadi rumit diri
kita sendiri. betul tak? :)