Tuesday, May 31, 2011

plain truth #2

"girl with short hair, 
smoke cigar,
talk bad words is hot" :B

because love is not the oxygen u breath for living

there's a time
bila orang tanya aku
are you okayyy?
said, yeah, im fine.
doing great, life made easy.
but the fact is I'm hurting
deeply on the inside.
I can fake all those smiles
I can tell everyone I'm
doing just fine.
but the fact is, I'm fucked up.
the real feeling is that I feel
nothing. empty. I don't know
what shud I feel. should I grieve
or should I be happy and moved on.
I'm moving on thou.
Fuck all craps.
macam ni lah. last night I asked
someone. what is one of your biggest fear?
I told mine. it's predicted as always.
I fear love a lot. I dont trust on relationship
love is overrated.
I mean why giving up so much when
all you get in return is nothing? (:
I'm a person that fall hard for someone.
a person that devoted, giving all I can
to the person I love most.
trust me, you'll never get better than me
because I'm obviously the best.
:) and im not going to waste it.never. (:

Monday, May 30, 2011

tired of everythingg

There's a time when you feel down.
You feel like to curl up like a child
and cry your heart out and
fall into a deep sleep and
don't want to face the world anymore.
that particular time when you get tired of everything.
and all you think is nothing.
I need my soul back.
where are you?
Im losing my mind.
I'm so fucking tired :(

Sunday, May 29, 2011

thank youu

If it's wrong to
tell you that I miss you
then I won't let my heart
be right. I miss you.
It was nice what we had
last night. thank you. (:

Friday, May 27, 2011

orang gila

Some people find arguing is fun.
But for others, they who like to argue a lot
are just some useless cuntbag that talks much.
We don't really care if you want to win the talk.
We lose nothing.
aku benci gila bila cakap ada je
yang nak di betah. last last dia yang salah.
malu weh. lantak kau la
nak cakap bnyk nak argue sampai
menang ke apaaa ke -.-

Friday, May 20, 2011

life made easyy

you attract what you think.
if you think you are not perfect
forever will be you are not perfect.
change the way you thinking
see everything from the bright side
attract positive vibes.
you are awesome.
you are the sweetest person
you are the greatest person among all.
have faith. you've done everything
in your power. it's his loss
for not having you for the rest of his life.
life made easy.
-The Secret

Thursday, May 19, 2011

love doesn't exist

love doesn't exist
roight? (:
whisper to me in the ear
you'll hurt me.
we were never meant
to be together.
you and me.
eternity is a liar.
tell me I'm not perfect.
tell me you have other person
waiting for youu.
tell me that you lied.
tell me what we had is
not real. tell me I'm a loser.
now tell me out loud,
is it love that being cruel to me
or is it just myself
who are never meant to be
perfect for anyone?

Wednesday, May 18, 2011


on the other hand
you can touch the moon
with your fingers.

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

plain truth

plain truth:
when I pledge to love someone. 
the heart, mind and soul will aligned together, 
they will only speak the language of love forever 
and promise to hold the person eternity .

snap. it's fucking shit simple 
cuma belum jumpa 
yang sama macam ni. 

and I don't need you to understand a shit about me.

eh engkau ni comel la.
siapa kau nak decide aku
should have gone thru
the broken hearted phase
for a long period of time or not?
sumpah lawak.
and I don't need you to understand
a shit about me.
only if you are interested with me.
then it sumkind of a problem.
sorry la I don't miss you.
what to do. life is about choices.
life is to live to the fullest.
if you appear as anonymous
by commenting my post,
that counts as tak de teloq.
haha. no hard feelings.
thanks for the advice.
mind you, I never really have
that skill in breaking up others' heart.
kau nak emo apehal?
nak comel comel kucing pulak. haha.
penat lah nak grieve lama lamaa.
dapat apa seyy? sakit hati adalah.
baik kau enjoy enjoy life, hidup chillax je.
ada adalah, tak ada tak apaa.
tapi tu lah. kalau kau sayang orang,
bagi all out. tak rugi apa pun.
in the end, their loss not us kan.
macam ni lah,
we live our own life, yours and mine
are two different path.
thanks for the advice mann.
really appreciate it :)

Monday, May 16, 2011


we shud do this
In the middle of the crowd.
haha :D

rules of loving

kau stop sayang orang yang tak sayang kau weh.

itu intro je. tak ada kene mengena
dengan apa I'm about to write.
mind you moving on is not that hard after all.
why took so long to mend your
broken heart. oh yeaaa,
let me tell you one secret.
in order to have a solid strong heart
you must allowed you heart to be
broken more or less ten to twenty times.
& I've been in that situation.
having a broken heart is not fun.
who likes it anywayyy?
tipu aku heart broken bnyk kali?
comeon, ni secret number 2.
bila kau ada soul connection
dengan someone, make it worth it.
feel it. love them with all your heart.
appreciate every second u spend
together.like seriously. skandal ke,
serious ke. lantak p la.
tapi bila you being with them,
remember, the vow of falling with
fully hearted is vital.
tgk, bila kene hurt, (i don't like calling it dumb)
kau heart broken, make it 10 times,
your heart will get stronger.
stronger macam mana?
macam ni, you'll learn how to
expect, allow and accept.
kalau ada adalah, kalau tak ada tak apa.
faham tak? jgn grieve lama lama
life is to live to the fullest. remeber that.

Sunday, May 15, 2011

the feeling after a good workout

oh my goddddd
and my abdomen is hurting
and all my muscles all over
me body is contracting
and I find it hard to move.
demmit. sakit weh sakit.
haha. tapi serious best.
tahu tak best macam mana?
best sbb rasa sengal sengal
rasa puas after you've
done the workout effectively.
i like this feeling much.
the microtiny tear of the muscles
that will recover with another
joining muscles is the best
feeling besides sitting at the libry
looking books at the shelves
and get high after smelling and looking
at all over the libry.
hahaha. *bridge, 1min 10sets -..-'*

do I make myself clear?

oh daharlinggg.
if you can feel me
thank you.
I miss you so much
do you knowww?
I miss you and I miss you.
malas nak reload
sbb nak contain the missing
feeling ni sampai dia burst.
haha. weyy, it hurts knowing
that feelings are abstract roight?
but it's okay.
we'll make it thru.
just go with the flow roight?
okay, seriously like
I miss you so much. heh -.-

Saturday, May 14, 2011

live life to the fullest

for having a good time
with friends. for a laughters
at the waterfall, for the
time spent at sentosa
watching fireworks.
for the movies marathon.
all of them was fantastic.
they are the strong reason
for me to keep on moving,
to live life to the fullest.

Friday, May 13, 2011

I miss you, really (:

all the time we spent together.
all those making silly faces we had
all the laughters we share
and all the things we did,
I am truly missing you right now.
this moment. hee.
can we meet in our next chapter of life?
bila dapat jumpa lagi?
haha.kalau ada jodoh, now u copying my words.
not fair :P i miss you.
take care there handsome (:

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

keri hilson tell me to be strong (:

I'll admit it, I was scared to answer loves call
And if it hits better make it worth the fall.

Sometimes love comes around
And it knocks you down
Just get back up
When it knocks you down

Monday, May 9, 2011

I'm thinking about you

maybe we were never meant to be together
we share tears laughters and interest.
you showed me you've been telling me about life.
I do anything in my power to be there for you
whenever you need me, I like you anyway,
you've been a good company to me. thanks.

and hello,
did you remember the night i sang
one in a million song by neyo to you?
I could just said it i meant it. but it was so soon.
short meeting but I like you. you're hot (:
eh, we'll meet someday, come over lah.
it's not that farr :) like it so much when you say,
miss you too actually. you're so sweet (:

everything is pathetic.
I guess that love wasn't enough.
spread your love like it is the last day
of your life. appreciate everyone around you
even thou they showed up for a while
and even thou they fooling around with your feelings.
because the rule of being a player is,
always has backups :)

aku seronok tipu kau tau (:

hey, kau kene tahu ini, aku tak pernah ada sekelumit pun rasa sayang kat kau.
Sayang aku pada orang lain. Kau ni tak ada guna. Dulu tinggal kan aku.
Sekarang aku puas hurt kau. Memang padan dengan muka kau.
sepuluh bulan dulu semua aku cakap semua aku tipu semua aku tipu, semuaa.
Sebab tu aku sengaja reka cerita konon aku tak pernah berkasih jadi tak reti 
nak berpegang tangan. sebab tu setiap kali aku cium kau, mata aku tak pernah tutup rapat.
sebab tu aku tak ada hati nak simpan number telefon kau dalam telefon aku.
sebab tu setiap kali kita jumpa aku padam semua inbox dalam telefon aku.
itu pun kau tak nampak ke? kau tak tahu ke yang aku mmg sayang orang lain
dari dulu? kau ni bukan siapa siapa pada aku pun. aku saja nak buang masa dengan engkau.
haha. memang ada setan dalam hati aku kata hancur kan hati kau kuat kuat.
aku tak pernah sayang kau. semua kata kata manis aku itu semua dusta. tak ada benarnya.
kau bodoh, pergi percaya kenapa? kau tak sempurna untuk aku. kau banyak cacat cela.
aku tak pernah sayang kau tau, seronok rasa tipu kau :)

I hate you with all my heart and soul :)

kalau aku jadi kau
aku hentak kepala dia
kuat kuat aku pukul
sampai mana dia lemah
nak mati tak ada kudrat
nak bangun
aku sumpah seranah dia
aku maki dia kuat kuat
aku pukul dia hentak
dengan kerusi belasah
muka dia sampai pecah
habis habis aku amik pisau
tikam dia berkali kali
tepat dekat hati.
haa. bagi mati. macam mana
dia buat hati aku mati.

I hate you with all
my heart and soul

Sunday, May 8, 2011

on your day, mak.

a note from hell :)

hello LUCIFER,



ya tuhan, muda lagi.life masih panjang (:

I moved on.
I don't dare to
let myself grieving
for too long.
such a waste of time.
because I have a lot of things
and many handsome and pretty
people around me.
they annoy me when I'm
about feeling down. haha.
bodoh tak bertempat.
had a great time spending
with them. love will come
when you do the things you love
together (:
take it or leave it.
life is love yourself to the fullest.
buang masa tahu, down lama lama
sebab hilang orang sebab putus cinta.
geli sikit :B haha.
dah lah, benda dah lepas, meh
kita live for future pulak.
dont get blurry with your past
and present and future.
you may end up gila. haha.

hypocrite and liar are two different things

moving on is not that hard after-all

macam mana nak cakap?
kalau kau kata itu revenge
aku tak ada tipu kau dulu.
at least aku tak drag relation tu
sampai sepuluh bulan.
kalau mengandung pun dah ber anak.
masa tu pun reason yang sama.
orang yang sama. aku malas.
aku dah fight. tapi aku tetap kalah.
so why trying so hard?
berapa bulan, tiga bulan je kan?
you mistaken blurry between the past and present.
tak apa lah. it's your choice. 
you call it revenge? after all what Ive been telling
you that I'll be the best, we can work things out 
together. senang nya reason kau. tak apa.
no wonder lah number aku pun x pernah save,
ramai lagi perempuan dalam hidup kau.
kau ni hot tau. haha. tak apa lah,
kalau ada orang lain lepas ni take a really good care
of her. tak pun kalau betul kau dgn amore,
bagus lah, sayang dia 100% macam mana 
kau sayang dia sekarang :)
jangan hurt dia tau. or mana mana perempuan 
yang kau sayang pun lah.
too bad aku kau tak pernah sayang.
is it too bad or too sad?
haha. tak kesah la. malas nak cakap panjang 
panjang. we're only teenagers,
Love is over-rated. 

Saturday, May 7, 2011

sumpah ini sakit

sampai satu tahap
kau rasa nak muntah
tengok lelaki lelaki
sekeliling kau.
kau nampak ada bertulis
LIAR kat dahi mereka.
macam itu aku rasa sekarang.
sakit tahu.

Friday, May 6, 2011

a strict post

okay. mula.
intro: tak suka boleh tapi jangan hina.
maybe ada few yang tak faham.
what the heck is going on dekat
blog aku ni. apesal bunyi dah
macam palat je kan. haha
sini aku try explain.
the fact is the person I love the most
did a very very unpleasing thing.
I wonder how he could hide all
those feelings and pretend to love me
but in the same time he's liking or loving
other girls? It sounds pathetic. really is.
no im not hina, I'm telling.
I will not ask you or begging you for a
explanation or anything.
It's not about hearing from other sides tau.
I'm considering about the past 2 months too.
Where the heck our love went?
I just don't feel you there. see? instinct speaks
louder than anything and the end,
it'll shows you the truth. truth hurts yeaa.
macam mana nak cakap eh?
kau tahu tak sayang aku kat kau tu
kalau dalam bahasa melayu,
aku sayang kau sampai mati.
tapi english version dia,
I love you to death even I promised you
We lived for forever. DON'T YOU REMEMBER?
alamak, semua pathetic, I don't believe every single
thing anymore. I told my mom, she said
let him go, life is sill a long way to go.
10 months for god sake.
well at least a fake happiness can really
make me feel happy. I appreciated.
thanks a lot. stop reading with kesian okay,
I'm fine. I'm totally fine.
amore, I am upset with you and mad.
seriously I am. but you'll know i'll be fine later.
and hisyam, apa you dapat buat I macam ni?
you tinggal orang yang sayang you
separuh nyawa dia? happy? suka lah kan?
tak apa. world is around. so do karma.
we'll see your part.
your drama is coming to the end.
I'm having a heartache almost giving up
on life. but again, life is still a long way to go.
I don't intend to meet you in my
next chapter of life. get away from me.
do you understand me? because u hurt me badly.
I feel fucked up. you happy rite by hurting me?
thank you. I don't know where went wrong
& yes, I am not perfect. never will i be.
you go find other girl that can love you
for half or maybe all her soul and body like
you love amore 100% soul & body.
it's pathetic. really. seriously.
mak kirim salam.
and oh, aku demam sebab kau tunggu nak mati je ni.
kau tak kesah kan? sbb the fact is
kau tak kisah pun pasal aku. kau saja nak main mainkan
feelings aku. terima kasih banyak banyak.
aku quit. bukan loser, tunggu org lain.
reserved sayang aku untuk orang yang deserve.
or else, aku mmg tak pernah layak
untuk siapa siapa pun. yeaa, panggil la aku loser.
tak kesah pun. so long lahh.
I'm tired of everything.
everything means nothing.
forever does not exist.
truth hurts, I love you. still.
waiting for your explanation. 

a lost note

thank you so much for what have you done.
macam ruined relation orang tu best kan.
okay lah, aku faham. itu bukan kau nak.
aku faham feelings tu abstract. aku faham
tak boleh control feelings. tapi kau
seronok lah bersenang senang.
where the fact is aku screwed kan.
yeay.mmg padan muka aku lah :)
kalau ada apa apa kau nak explain,
tolong cepat sikit. lagi pun aku x akan
percaya dah. aku penat. aku gave up.
aku memang weak. lagi lagi kalau dalam
hal macam ni. bukan aku ada cakap dulu
once kalau kau happy ada sayang orang lain
aku back off. aku tak fight. tapi kau silap.
aku FIGHT for kau dah. kau lupa.
mudah sangat lupa. tak apa lah.
malam tadi semalaman aku
tak tidur pagi tadi last paper tau.
bukan mintak kesian kau tau.
aku nak beritahu je bagi kau faham.
maybe kau tak rasa apa aku rasa.
yea, aku pun x rasa macam mana kau rasa
rasa tipu orang dengan kau cakap kau sayang dia
rasa tipu orang then lastly aku find out sendiri
rasa feelings tu x boleh control dah lama dah
kau orang berkasih kasih.
rasa macam macam lah kan.
thank you very much.
tak dapat nak express thru words.
aku appreciate semua apa kau buat
kat aku sekarang. penat.
penat dah. aku rasa aku x deserve untuk
siapa siapa pun. aku tak perfect.
aku ni teruk sangat lah, tak reti treat kau.
sorry kalau aku ada buat salah.
banyak sangat salah kat aku
sampai kau sanggup buat aku macam ni kan.
terima kasih cinta,


aku mmg x perfect
sampai mati pun

Thursday, May 5, 2011

WOW. im impressed :)

hisyam takleh stop sayang aku,faez
dia tak boleh
he told me one day
i'm so,so,so sorry to tell you this
but i want you to at least question him
ask him abt the truth
he told me
his heart and soul 100% untuk aku,takde untuk orang lain.
i'm not making stories
aku pun hate benda ni
aku bukan orang single yang dia boleh buat macamni
and i hate him for not contacting you
sedangkan hari2 dia text aku
even aku tak reply
he calls if i dont text him back
he says he misses me
i'm sorry
faez,aku faham kalau kau tak contact aku.but aku mintak maaf sangat2.
sorry weh faez. i didnt want things to be this way..

love is in the air. snap. who's farting anyway? XD

we love someone so much 
willing to scarifies ANYTHING
for their happiness.

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

if it is all that matters

whenever you feel
lethargic the only way
to get rid of it
is by workout.
go to gym, have some sweat
and pull some weights.
it cud be awesomee.

sadness can overtake happiness

sadness killing
every minute
of happiness we had.
i miss you
and happy 10 months

sepuluh bulan

kalau kau nak tahu.
hari ni genap 10 bulan
aku dengan kau.
10 bulan tau. lama kan.
tapi malam ni
malam paling sedih
aku rasa sepanjang
setiap bulan bulan
kita together.
kau faham tak?
tak tak, aku yang
tak faham kau.
aku yang tak faham
kau sedang sibuk exam.
aku yang selfish
nak kau sekarang.
sorry. sorry gila.
aku banyak susah kan kau.
kalau kau nak tahu,
past 2 months yang lepas
aku hardly rasa presence
kau.entah laaaa maybe
sebab jarak.masa.
tapi tak boleh salahkan tu semua.
aku tak tahu mana
silap. aku sendiri barangkali.
aku nak beritahu kau,
tak ada seorg manusia
dalam dunia ni
boleh buat apa kau buat
apa aku rasa.
boleh buat mata aku sembab
berhari hari fikir pasal kau
boleh buat aku nervous
everytime jumpa kau
boleh buat aku rasa
cantik bila ada dekat
dengan kau. kau faham?
kalau aku tak kisah,
kalau aku ada bnyk org lain
aku dah tak kisah
apa jadi dgn kita.
aku sayang kau.
aku sayang kau gila babi.
kalau beri aku satu juta
orang pun tak ada yang
dapat replace kau.
kau tahu tak? tak ada
yang boleh buat aku
rasa macam mana kau
buat aku rasaa semua tu.
aku rindu kau,
aku kalau boleh nak kau
selalu, nak dekat,
macam mana. kene
accept kita mmg jauh macam ni.
jauh dari distance.
jauh dengan keadaan kau.
aku kene accept.
kau bukan civilian.
aku kene faham semua tu.
beri aku masa sikit.
tapi kalau boleh,
malam ni aku nak lari
jumpa kau
beritahu kau yang aku
sayang kau sampai mati.
aku sayang kau seorang.
kalau jarak kita dekat
memang aku ada sebelah kau
hisyam please,
siapa siapa baca beritahu dia
aku sayang dia sangat sangat
sebab aku tahu dia
dah tak baca blog aku.
kenapa? busy gila katanya.
happy 10 months together

Monday, May 2, 2011

mom ):


I can sense sadness in your eyes
I can feel failure in your heart
I know you upset about me
I am not perfect
I am not a perfect daughter to you
never I can be.
there is no such word
except sorry.
sorry for all things I've done
for failed in my SPM
for being rude all the time.
for being a bad daughter.
I am sorry mom. ):

the one i love the most

korang kena take note benda2 mcm tu...
the art of main baseline lain dgn spot lain....
it can be disastrous if x kena caranye...
dpt bola terus triple threat
then jab step then shoot or cut....
if x makan fake, then shoot or pass...
then cut masuk
yup, tp kena btl2 lock the target...
kena tau range of shooting...
berapa kuat shot kena ambik based kpd distance....
tu br effective shot..nak shoot kena tgk distance org dpn kita...
if rapat sgt mmg kena shot kita kena contest...
shot yg bagus ialah shot yg x kena contest..
that's why kena carik tempat kosong
supaya senang nak shot....psl kita tau kita slow
based on current situation...
main ikut current situation....jumper kena btlkan....
blaja mcm mana shoot satu tgn n stationary shooter....
- abg rossman (2011)

sepuluh pilih satu

kau beri aku
pilih satu juta
pun hati aku
tetap kat dia.
tiup kuat mana
goncang lah
hebat mana.
cinta sayang aku
satu saja.


yelah semua salah aku :)

macam ni lah,
jangan cakap dekat aku
take care of him.
instead please tell him
that he needs to take
a really good care
of me.
because I'm having
a heartache
right now.
thank you :)

he's going away? like seriously? where?

he's going away?
seriously i don't get it.
what are you trying
to tell me anonymous?
he's leaving me or
you taking him from me?
in either way
i really don't get it.
enlighten me,
please (:
tell me, i will ensure you
i won't get mad.
or upset or sad or wtv.
ur phrase missing
a content.

Sunday, May 1, 2011

another addiction besides hisap gam :B

eventhou me always
being consider as a very
lazy not so pandai student,
I have this one addiction.
towards library.
the reason why i like
it so much to lepak
at libry is all because
of the smell of the books
dekat shelves tu.
omg omg omg.
diorg sangat cantik and
menarik :B
not that aku boleh study
senyap senyap
but it's the environment.
best wa cakap sama lu.
p/s: study hard and party hard.
that wud be legal :B