Wednesday, December 29, 2010

everyone has their fears

okay.
It's been six months since I'm in relation
with someone.
everyone have their own blind spots
their weaknesses and their fears.
for me, the hardest part being
in relation is falling so hard for someone.
for the one we love.
I don't need eyes when I can love blindly.
I never really take any love for granted.
True love is nothing when we slipped it away.
finding a true love is hard.
identifying a true love is hard too.
but one thing I know for sure
when you're in love,
love you partner with all your heart and soul.
no matter what happens. no matter how.
you got to be true to your partner.
I don't think loving your partner with all your
heart and soul counted as pathetic.
haha.
enormously caring is another side of me.
but but then all those things about my past
have taught me a lot.
I can go loving my guy fucking damn much,
but I won't, god's will
to cause him any problem.
awhh, come on. loving and having a good life is
always in the same wavelengths.
for me, I only fight
for thing that worth
fighting and dying for.
because we
work out for our relation,
pray hard to god,
and wait patiently
for the day
that we will be
together forever.
always bee bee.
thanks for giving me chance
to love you
with all my heart & soul.

we're teen

enemies

You got enemies?
Good.
That means you actually stood up
for something in your life.

-Eminem

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

kalau ada .......

kalau ada sumur di ladang,
ada kerbau tak?
hahaha,

i hate to say out loud
that eff word,
you know what it is.
:D
make it hilarious so that
life is something interesting.
because pressure
is no longer my pleasure.

Monday, December 27, 2010

words for thought

I never thought being a girl was a fantastic gift ever.
I always think being a guy is so much cooler.
but then, being in between is super duper superb.
conclusion is, life is always about choices.
Just be yourself

make up? apa tu? :O

cakap pasal make up.
haha. lawak sial.
aku tak pernah rasa nak make up
make up. truth is sumpah aku rasa
bila pakai make up rasa gedik semacam
macam orang gedik gedik.
haha.
geli tahu?
tapi tapi bila consider balik
yang aku ni perempuan
apa salah nyaa
try something yang tak pernah kita try.
& kalau nak try pun
aku suggest pergi try benda yang elok elok
bukan pergi mabuk ke, hisap dadah ke.
;D
recently aku dapat xmas present.
okay tak pelik pun, tapi it was very funny
lah kan to get eyeshadow. fucked up
never imagine i could go and wear all
those girlish thingy.
my fren's mom once said,
" put some make up, to make more beautiful
because we are girls"
see, we should appreciate
what god gives us lah kann.
i mean perempuan tu sangat lah
special. we can go dress up and
put some make up on our face
to make glamorously shining & beautiful.
oh satu hal,
nak jadi beautiful on the outside
kau mesti betul betul pure and
beautiful from the inside.
that's the basic.
tak ada lain, kau tak wear make up pun,
if people tgk best je nak pandang
tak bosan that's mean kau mmg cantik
betul betul. tak fake.
fake nampak pelik,
no matter berapa tebal makeup kau pakai
tak akan nampak the natural beauty.

okay, apa aku nak cakap kat sini
pakai lah make up tebal mana
gincu pekat manaa
kalau kau dah mmg cantik
tak ada hal.
semua perempuan out there,
come on, life is beautiful
so do we !
;DD

*i was a total tomboy*
wearing guy's tee is may fav
having spikey hair was my style.
but, you got me what am i right now bee bee.
changes is sometimes good.
but not to drastic.
be urself nway.
life is about choices.
faham kan? (:

Saturday, December 25, 2010

can dreams last forever?

girl: why are you alone out here at this bus station?
what are you looking for? aren't you should be home by now?
your mom would really worried about you.
boy: it's okay, I'm just being here for awhile. come here, i need a hug.
*hugging tightly*


okay, I really hope I won't wake up
because I see u clearly in my dream
I miss you so much it hurts
:)

Christmas eve

tonite was fun.
I had a blast night.
to dance all night long with
long lost schoolmates
was fun !
I couldn't describe more.
okay, bottom line
merry christmas to those
who celebrating it.

to shake all
those stress by doing what
you like
is breath-taking
you can always party on your own,
turning little freaks is not a crime.
macam aku cakap
bila ada problem atau stress
atau feeling blues
don't stop urself to find
some entertainment to lupa sekejap
and eventually lupa terus ur
problems.
come on, life is to enjoy to the fullest.
don't you dare to say that you having a good life
if there's no problem going on with ur life
biatches :D

Friday, December 24, 2010

sorry bee bee

tak tak.
tak nag dah.
sorry :(
heart youuu
<3

how was it?

these some of my fav pics;
we don't go & tell people we go to overseas every month.
HAHA

okay, ion shopping center.

-..- short and fat. haha

gambar xmas lg lawa dr gmbar raya?
hahah. mungkin.

farouk's princess. :DD

gila tak ingat dunia berjalan.
but it was fun obviously.
pergi 1100 balik 0300
how was that?
lama gilaa. -..-
again let pictures do the talking.


Thursday, December 23, 2010

kalau ini fikiran lelaki

aku rasa sometimes perempuan ni
macam fuck jugak tau,
24 jam nak berkepit dengan boyfriend.
weh minah, kalau kau tu bini tak apa la
ini baru je jadi girlpren aku
dah sibuk busy memanjang nak mebebel bebel
segalaa. alahai, rimas aku dibuat nya.
nak di tegur sayang,
nak di marah nanti merajuk.
susah nak layan kau orang ni lah.
baru tak text sekejap fikir macam macam
fikir aku ada betina lain lah
fikir aku pergi menggatal lah
fikir yang bukan bukan je fikir dia.
apa masalah? kau tak trust lelaki ke?
ingat semua lelaki ni sama suka main kayu kayu ?
kalau kita org dah cakap sayang kau
seorang makna nya kau seorg je lah.
tapi kalau ada perempuan yang menggatal dgn aku
apa salah nya aku layankan kan?
alah, saja saja buat sedap.
nak test power ni haa, mantap lagi tak
cara mengorat nyaa.
okay ke tak? haha.
alah alah, kalau kita org dah syg, kita syg la
dekat awek tu.
ada awek yang boleh buat kita gila lagi.
apa hal nya tu? kau org bikin rileks je.
tak payah nak kecoh kecoh gelabah
macam besok nak perang.
kalau aku busy duk main game tu faham lah sikit,
aku tgah main game. ish, itu pun nak ckp.
game dgn kau org awek2, game lagi
best, boleh puas kan aku.
haha, kau org pun
kalau nak sentap merajuk cukup lah
sekali masa time time nak ke tengah ke atau sesudah
datang bulan. kalau hari hari
alamat sesak la aku nak melayan. hahaha.
lagi satu, bukan tak suka kau canang satu dunia
kita sedang bersama tapi kau tak rasa
kita tu tak de lah fames mengalah kan angelina jolie dgn brad pitt.
haha. cukup sekadar aku sayang kau, kau sayang aku.
faham kan?

ini fikiran lelaki. memang cool.
kita pun sayang kan?
jadi tak perlu buat satu benda tu
complicated. chill je.
wah, kira kira pengalaman tu
banyak jugak jasa diaorg.
haha. okay lah,
ni sikit je apa aku boleh share.
tak tahu lah perempuan tu fikiran dia kompleks mcm mana.
and well, tuhan tu Maha Mengetahui.
di ciptakan sesuatu itu saling berpasangan kan?
bayangkan semua orang plain?
mungkin dunia jadi bosan dan dull.
bottom line is, just be thankful for everything :D

eHOW?

okay, come on pretty
don't waste your time to feel sad,
frown, down, gloomy,
life is to enjoy to the fullest.
feeling blues?
flick your lighter until a flame appears.
pull out a cigar,
light the end opposite from the filter as you breathe in.
Keep trying until smoke begins to come out
of that end away from your mouth.
You should notice that the tobacco end of the cigarette is lit.
fucked up. i never really know that smoking instructions
can be googled. This is so cool.
hahaha. why smoke when u know it just a waste
of money?
haha. it depends on individual.
on ehow u can ask any fucking things u want.
from personal to feelings,
from cooking to learning.
it just there man.
if you are not sure about anything,
let your fingers running thru those alphabets on the keyboard
and pooofff, the answer pops-up. funny isn't it?
anything anything
sometimes I feel world wide web is no longer
secure. people can do anything.
everything about any single thing
can be learned, read and understand.
w o w.
this is what I call life !
:DD

beauty and the beast

I just wish for a magic mirror like belle used
in her beauty and the beast movie
so that I can see exactly what are you doing right now,
because being miles apart with you
sometimes can drive me insane and I do seriously miss you.

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

worth fighting and dying for

"What I have with him is worth it.
It is worth every lonely night,
every tear I cry from missing him
and the pain I feel from not having him close.
It is worth it because he is my one and only.
When I picture myself years from now,
I see only him.
No matter how painful distance can be,
not having him in my life would be so much worst!"

being an army girlfriend is my superpower

If you're not in love with a soldier, you can't know adventure.
You don't know smelly gray PT uniforms that require a daily washing.
You can't understand green and brown camouflaged bags flooding your bedroom floor.

If you're not in love with a soldier,
you can't understand the meaning of the phrase
"going to the field" and the weeks you spend away from each other.

If you're not in love with a soldier,
you can never imagine the hole in your heart
when that phone call comes?
"Honey, I am leaving tomorrow to go overseas.
I don't know how long I will be gone or exactly where I am going,
but I want you to know that I love you - always!"

If you're not in love with a soldier,
you don't know what it's like to say that final good-bye.
You don't know what it really means to be glued to the television.
You don't understand fear and
you can't possibly understand the sleepless nights
of endless crying wondering
if you will ever see the love of your life alive again.

If you're not in love with a soldier,
you can't truly understand how to make
every moment count
because you never know when that phone call may come again.

If you're not in love with a soldier,
you can never really understand how very delicate life is!

Monday, December 20, 2010

awhh, it was nothing. I miss you sahaja. :D

aku busy kan diri
harap harap dapat lupa
aku dalam state rindu
kau gila babi.
tapi sebab darah yang
mengalir dalam badan aku
udara yang aku hela
semua ada kau,
so rindu aku kat
kau every second pun
tak lekang.
kuat impact kau dalam
hidup aku.
:D best, aku suka. biar dia stay okay?
jangan bagi feelings tu pergi mana
mana. biar je.
haha. somekind of
miracle bila find out
aku boleh hold on, sabar, semua la.
aku rasa bliss gila weh.
rasa unbelievable.
tak tahu, feelings tu mcm
tak boleh nak describe.
tahu tak?
pagi tadi aku jalan jalan
fikir boleh tak kalau nak jumpa
this coming christmas?
hoo. then, second thought
you did told me yesterday
you really want a break a rest.
so, tak apa lah. maybe i can hold on.
tunggu bila bilaa lah we can meet.
oh i dont fucking mind
bila boleh jumpa
sebab i think kita ada
a lifetime to spend with.
so why rush? ;DD
and and,
GOOD THINGS COME TO THOSE WHO WAIT.
seriously kan? ;DD

come on, he just a KID


It took me
many days to confess
that I am seriously
a big fan of
JUSTIN BEIBER.
wtf? :O
I mean seriously.
-.-'
they told me that
I just like his song.
but then,
I deny it, because
I don't just like his song,
I like JB too.
which part?
hahaha. he look so cute like
a new born baby boy.
BOLEH TAKK?
HAHAHA.
shit shit shit.
I feel gay man.
to confess that I
LIKE JB !
bee bee. u ada new rival.
HAHA. no no,
I like you more hunnyBee.
heheh

Sunday, December 19, 2010

haha. lawak macam gampang

bukan aku nak berlagak ke apa
tapi kalau kau dah bagi
telefon genggam kau pengaturan dia
bahasa melayu memang lah aku
terkebil kebil tak faham
sebab telefon genggam yang aku biasa
guna pengaturan bahasa orang putih.
kalau kau tanya aku perkataan
pelik pelik yang mesin telekomunikasi ni guna
dalam bahasa melayu pun aku tak dapat
nak jadi kamus terbaik untuk kau.
ingat aku hebat sangat bahasa melayu?
kalau aku hebat dah lama berdiri
sebaris a.samad said, hamka beliau semua tu.
masuk akal ke kau cakap aku bodoh
melayu sebab aku tak tahu
perkataan mesin telekomunikasi
tu guna bahasa melayu.
kalau kau hebat sangat apesal tak fikir
sendiri apa benda dia mencarut
dalam mesin telekomunikasi kau tu?
kau pun bodoh bm jugak?
semata mata aku sekolah habis
pergi kolej semua tu kau ingat aku tahu
fasih cekap hebat bahasa melayu la?
bahasa melayu aku tahap karyawan la?
kalau kau nak tahu, ilmu aku ni
kalau bentang laut yang luas tu
setitik air laut je ilmu aku tu.
memang salah aku la
tak pergi guna telefon genggam
aku dalam bahasa melayu?
bodoh. lupa diri aku melayu
asik nak cakap bahasa orang putih je.
apa pun semua bahasa org putih,
dari bercakap sampai belajar
semua orang putih.
melayu memang macam ni tak sedar diri.
boleh ke macam tu?
MAKE SENSE KE?
cukup jelas tak aku tulis dalam bahasa melayu ni?
ke bahasa melayu pun
kau TAK FAHAM?
bungolan -.-'

Saturday, December 18, 2010

closing account ?

I really don't want to make another post
because talking pictures down there
are freaking cutee.
haha.
this post basically for all readers out there
thanks for browsing at this
enough bloggie.
"when the world said enough,
never really had enough thou.
Enough kindda not exist."
the ups and downs in my life
i wrote it here.
from the start to the end.
from lonely to joy.
from dark to bright.
from sadness to happiness.
few times thinking about closing
this account,
I dont know.
might this account no longer active
or anything.
hmm. oh shoot,
am blogging for almost a year.
I remember the first time i was writing
this blog.
I was writing about myself,
about sadness, the state of feeling down,
frown and fucked up.
BUT, YES, PEOPLE CHANGE
why? BECAUSE TIME IS THE MAIN FACTOR.
changing can be good most of the time.
change from bad to better,
loser to hero,
anything. :D
a year man, pheww.
COME ON, YOU GUYS DID READ EVERYTHING
IN THIS BLOG AREN'T YOU? :DD
the mood goes like,
rebellious, self-motivated, love,
family, life and so on.
still. thinking bout closing this account.
we'll see.

BIG HEART FOR ALL
THE DIRECTLY AND INDIRECTLY
FOLLOWERS. :D
THANKS. without you guys,
this blog is nothing.

Thursday, December 16, 2010

talking pictures

ahh, purrr-fect combination, white and red. :DD
naisss, thanks for the pic pretty ! :D


i like this one most :DD
pencahaya-an cantik. ahaa, syan comel je ;D
fanaa, rusy,me n syann


oh, cik syan and me.
adds-on? LOL


she's pretty good man, ;DD


cute ! i like this pic too. :DD
haha, paling tak boleh blah,
reverse ke belakang.
sumpah gelak sampai sakit perut.
plus plus, "SEKARANG SEKARANG SEKARANG !"
hahaha
have a great day btw.
thanks hearts <3

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

:DD



this two should be okay
(:

memory lost wud be great maybe?


why is it always
not so easy
to forgive and
harder to forget?
if I ever had a chance,
choosing between
coma and memory lost,
I would choose memory lost.
BUT, there's a thing I
wouldn't want to forget.
It is the sweetest thing that
ever happens to my life.
and that is you.
no doubt bout that bee. (:

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

hair go go grows faster :DD


and if it's long.
sure do look like this?
isn't it nicee?
oh i can't wait.
4 years, faster,
I want my hair to be really longg.

lovey dovey bee bee

My Heart Believes In You
I kept my head up high,
and then you came my way.
I have been hurt so many times.
My heart filled with so much pain.
but now that pain has gone away.
For I have found a place I want to be.
This place I see is with thee.
For in your arms I have felt and seen,
a wonderful feeling that I cannot believe.
A safe haven in your arms just for me.
Now I give my heart to thee.
For my heart believes in you.

-Stewart Bradshaw

it means more than enough.
(: <3

the same old song

17th october 2010

do u remember the last time we
spent time together?
we went to watch sammy the turtle.
the last minute you're about to leave me,
I am totally lost.
asking myself badly what if we never meet again?
I cried. yes. because I felt so down and sad.
do u know everynite i would look up to the sky finding the brightest star,
wishing that we could meet again someday somewhere.
do you know that everytime u tell me maybe
we can meet pretty soon,
my heart fills with roses and flowers?
and when u tell me again that you're not sure about meeting me,
honestly, my heart crushed and I'm trying hard to calm myself.
I know, deep down inside u. u feel the same way too.
because I strongly believe that
our hearts beat the same rhythm.
sorry, this is what bothering me.
hmm. it's okay, I can handle myself.
there's nothing we can do rite?
except for praying to god, if fate decides that you're the one for me
in any place on the earth we will be together
forever. (:
I LOVE YOU HISYAM.

lovely puppy

hey puppy,
u alone too?
u look sad.
don't worry you'll get new friends
soon. take care.
don't be harsh.
hmm.
take care okay?
:'(

Sunday, December 12, 2010

you got me beggin'

tak semua orang thankful dengan apa yang dia ada.
bila ada buat tak faham, tak ada, baru lah terfikir.
bila masa MJ hidup, semua nak jatuhkan dia, bila dah tak ada?
bila ada mak dekat sebelah bebel bebel cakap bising, bila tak ada?
bila ada kawan yang sanggup nagis gelak dgn kau, kau cakap sibuk,
bila tak ada nanti macam mana ada yang sama?
bila ada orang care pasal kau hari hari tny apa cerita, kau cakap bosan,
bila tak ada baru rasa sunyi?
bila ada education tinggi tinggi senang senang cakap tak boleh achieve 4 flat,
bila tak ada, cuba tengok mereka yang tak ada peluang nak belajar?
bila ada duit berjuta juta banyak macam mana pun,
bila dah bankrupt baru nak rasa menyesal tak saving?
sampai esok pun panjang panjang tak habis punya,

current playlist:
mike posner
baby please don't go

sorry I lied

okay. I lied.
I have tonnes in my mind.
I just don't want to let it all out.
because I know u're having a rough time too.
sorry. I'm not being complicated.
I'm being just fair enough.
I don't want to nag around telling you this and that.
I don't really know what best to do.
missing you is one major problem.
I seem can't really sort what-so-ever on my mind
ritee now.
really are my problem huh?
:(
sorry.

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

poor child

when it comes to study,
I only know A grade.
since i was little.
for getting B in examination,
I'll feel loser. I feel bad.
mom would call me stupid.
and I hate that.
she did called me few times.
why? because I didn't get good grades
in my examinations.
should I blame anyone?
NO, because it's all my fault.
I hate being call stupid,
who likes it anyway?
no one.

all i need to do is expect, allow, and except.
it's fucking hard. I tell you.

i believe

GOOD THINGS
COME TO THOSE
WHO WAIT

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

sayang oi (:

bee,

thanks for simply being there for me.
I can't find any words other than
THANK YOU to express my feeling
towards everything what you did to me
for the past 5 months.
honestly, i fucking freaking miss you so much
bee bee. but I can do nothing.
sitting here in my bed praying with tears
wishing that somewhere somehow u were beside me.
I miss you so much. and
DECEMBER counting days to meet you,
and be with you till my last breath.

all those scumbags

ni aku malas dah nak cakap banyak banyak.
biar lah, apa nak jadi.
tahu tak lepas dua tahun baru kau nak regret semua benda?
biarkan je semua,
sebab ada benda tuhan janji kat kau akan dtg.
biar kau jadi kambing hitam,
jadi telur tembelang ke, biarkan.
biarkan apa diorg nak judge nak fikir.
malas la nak ckp bnyk.
sendiri pun tak sedar diri. susah la.
biar jee. biar kan. satu hari nanti semua pun settle.
fuck you laa weh, fak ER !

Friday, December 3, 2010

kurus pun tak best -..-

bila kau turun berat badan.
bila rasa perasan diri ringan,
bila tgk dada mengecil.
bila rasa punggung dan peha
maintain membesar,
bila part atas semua kurus,
ahh fuck la.
kurus tak best. bila gemuk,
nak kurus. mcm gampang.
perempuan, mcm tu la.
ahh, kau jgn ingat kau lelaki
tak complain body figure.
hahah. nak buff mcm bodybuilder.
aku tahuu.
oh ni, how to look sexy?
BE COMFORTABLE WITH YOURSELF
:DD

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

WARdrobe with mommy

mom: I don't understand why u keep on buying clothes?
daughter: emm. being up to date with clothes mommy? 0.O
mom: ur closet upstairs already full with clothes. why aren't you wear everything?
daughter: gulp *gosh, mommy that clothes are all zaman jahiliah dulu when I was a total tomboy. can't you see I'm ur grown up princess? -.-' come on. I'm just being a little up to date with now-days fashion. do you forgot that I really wanted to be a fashion designer when I was little? bla bla bla* (too many excuses)

reminder: when we are about to be PARENTS, we kindda need to keep updated with surroundings and all. oh, and seriously you have to really tahu ur child's gender. bhahaha. I wonder why my dad like me to dress like a boy? o.O maybe he taught someday I can be so handsome like him? gosh, i look more like dean winchester from supernatural. sumpah tak tipu. HAHAHA. sebab tu kut daddy likes me to dress like a boy. wink* -.-'

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Tangled - Healing Song

because he is the best coach

dad,
ur the greatest coach
in anything
especially when it comes
to life.
thanks a million !
and oh,
RAPUNZEL just simply best.
haa. tak tengok rugi.
bee bee, u look like
that prince charming
in rapunzel. haa,
the greatest thief dalam kampung.
&& you are the bad guy
who stole my heart
but i love it <3

Friday, November 26, 2010

naked jom.


haha,
sebab balik rumah laa
boleh tido naked.
wah. sumpah seronok !
:D

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

formspring yang sgt comel

haha. ini lawak:
*click untuk tumbesaran.*

I would shout out loud
to the entire world
that I am completely
happy and thankful
for having you in my life.
full-stop.

apek apek. lu apa tau? :P

I really need you to be PERSISTENT and UNSHAKABLE
because I hate myself.
I'm really are
ANNOYING
DIFFICULT
COMPLICATED
SELFISH
DISTRESSING
ENORMOUSLY-CARING
and EASILY UPSET.
sorry lah apek eh, I mmg mcm ni.
so, THANKS for past months,
u really are persistent and unshakable.
&& I love you so much.
I adore u much <3

fat bastard, I HATE YOU

I saw ur fat belly in front of me face,
dang, u look so fat la bastard !
why did you told me that my answer was wrong
when it's freaking righttt,
when I'm fucking shit confident with my answer.
screwed you fat setan !
bongok. kacau aku nak jawab exam pulak -..-
heh. tulah, mak cakap tadi jawab tak baca doa.
padan muka ! haha
okay okay.
gelak kan aku pulak. :(
merajuk lah dengan mak.


okay dah.
tak merajuk. :)
haha. mmg lawak pun.
tak pasal setan kene maki.
eh, moral of the story kan,
always TRUST UR FIRST INSTINCT.
tu je, tak de nye nak doubt2 bila tga paper ni.
:8)

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

now the part 2 goes in. (LTWYL)

This morning,
you wake, a sunray hits your face
Smeared makeup as we lay in the wake of destruction
Hush baby,
speak softly,
tell me I'll be sorry

That you pushed me into the coffee table last night
So I can push you off me
Try and touch me
so I can scream at you not to touch me
Run out the room
and I'll follow you like a lost puppy

Baby,
without you,
I'm nothing,
I'm so lost,
hug me
Then tell me how ugly I am,
but that you'll always love me

Then after that, shove me, in the aftermath of the
destructive path that we're on,
two psychopaths but we
know that no matter how many knives we put in each other's backs
That we'll have each other's backs,
'cause we're that lucky

Together, we move mountains,
let's not make mountains out of molehills,
You hit me twice, yeah, but who's countin'?
I may have hit you three times,
I'm startin' to lose count
But together,
we'll live forever,
we found the youth fountain

Our love is crazy,
we're nuts,
but I refused counsellin'

This house is too huge,
if you move out
I'll burn all two thousand square feet of it to the ground,
ain't shit you can do about it
With you I'm in my f-ckin' mind,
without you,
I'm out it

because Eminem don't rapped
about money, bitches, cars,
he shows another side of life.
life is a movie.

Sunday, November 21, 2010

sebab sebab nya

sebab dunia tu tak seindah kita nak karang
sebab realiti tu kadang pahit ditelan
sebab mimpi tu jarang jadi kenyataan
sebab diri tu banyak kesalahan
sebab sendiri inginkan kemajuan
sebab semua pun menagih kasihsayang
sebab tuhan ada sebab musabab kita dibangkitkan
kita usaha, kita doa, kita tawakal.
kalau benar itu milik kau,
sebab mulai sekarang kau kena yakin.
sebab bunyi jantung kita orang berdegup
semua sama. tak ada yang bersenandung,
tak ada yang meraung.
(:

Saturday, November 20, 2010

B.o.B - Don't Let Me Fall [Official Music Video]





Well it was just a dream
Just a moment ago
I was up so high
Lookin down at the sky
Don’t let me fall
I was shooting for stars
On a Saturday night
They say what goes up
Must come down
But don’t let me fall (x3)
They say what goes up
Must come down
But don’t let me fall
Don’t let me fall

Cause I’m glidin up there
Oh so very high that if the
Clouds were to drop me
Than I’d fall out the sky
I don’t really know why I’m here
I guess I’m just here for the ride
I swear it feels like I’m dreamin
This vividly defined, yeah
So call me whenever you want
Call me whenever you’d like
But lets get one thing straight
You know my name, so I run this town
When I’m on my mic
So here I go B.O.B, Bobby Ray
I don’t know, leedahdoe
But I know that I flow
Rack em up, lock em down
Dominos, then I go
Where’s my story goes
How did I been done down here before
Come into my eastern catered home
Cause I was in the cold
Tryin to keep my toes unfroze
Now I’m in your house
Now I’m in your stove
Now I’m everywhere that your ipod goes
Everything I seen was a dream
Just a moment ago

But it was just a dream
Just a moment ago
I was up so high
Lookin down at the sky
Don’t let me fall
I was shootin for stars
On a Saturday night
They say what goes up
Must come down
But don’t let me fall (x2)
They say what comes up
Must go down
But don’t let me fall (x2)
They say what comes up
Must come down
But don’t let me fall
Don’t let me fall


Yeah, not far much longer
From where that pavement is
Cause there aint no parachute
That they can make for this
Cause I put my pain my heart
My soul my faith in this
Does anyone feel like how I feel
Then you can relate to this
Just a blaze of this
Maybe roll one up and take a hit
Toast to the good life
Then take a sip
Vaca(tion) everyday then take a hit
It was easy to see I was made for this
From the move all the way
To the way I spit
Just to show all you niggas
What greatness is
I’m talkin very loosic(?)
Like makin movies
To picture my life, boy
You need a higher resolution
I used to cut class everyday
Then run away at night
But now I’m ruler of the upperclass
And I don’t even write

But it was just a dream
Just a moment ago
I was up so high
Lookin down at the sky
Don’t let me fall
I was shootin for stars
On a Saturday night
They say what goes up
Must come down
But don’t let me fall

heee

because you are,

devoted
pleasant
considerate
lovely
dazzling
genuine
reliable
eternal
persistent
unshakable
down-to-earth
sympathetic.
&& not a liar.
oh2,
and COMEL.

sbb tu i syg u :)

biarkan semuaa

kau fikir kompleks sgt.
tak ada apa pun.
sebab tak pernah ber salah faham
ini baru first time.
chill la. benda kecik boleh setel.
kalau hilang aku pun
masih boleh cari lah.
ada benda jauh lagi
lebih penting dari aku kan.
:)
ada, ada lah, tak ada tak apa.

I miss you so much



sigh~
I miss you bee bee :(

it's okayy


we're having rough time together.
no worries.
things will be okay soon.
I'll be missing you
every second. :')

I can feel your hearbeat, love

sebab aku yakin ler

kita doa sama sama lah.
habis cerita, doa banyak banyak
:DD
doa bnyk bynk permudah segala urusan
dunia akhirat
serba serbi owhh.
bukan setakat nak 4 flatt.
kau duduk mengadap lappie,
doa ke mana
4 flatt ke manaa?
HAHAH.
beragak lah wei.
usaha, doa, tawakal.
peh, da macam
motto sekolah sekolah rendah pulak.
dah itu basic dia, kau jgn
bebel bnyk wehh,
haha.
gedempol, imyilah

ini kisah cinta dia

pernah dengar cerita cinta tulus ?
jangan gelak bila aku cakap cinta ini wujud.
bukan, bukan cinta yang selalu kau org perkatakan
jauh sekali cinta yang landasan nya nafsu semata.
biar intro nya kisah cinta Nabi adam dan hawa.
kenapa mereka di campak ke bumi?
sebab musabab Allah murka dengan mereka kerana
gagal menurut perintah-Nya.
haa, dan dari kewujudan Nabi Adam ni sendiri
kita lihat, manusia dan kesilapan itu
saling bersangkut paut.
oh, ini jauh sekali soal ber khutbah atau tazkirah.
buat tatapan diri sendiri khususnya dan sekalian makhluk.
bila mana aku cerita balik soal cinta tulus ini.
bila kau rasa cinta kau tak berpaksi pada nafsu,
berpaksi pada kasih sayang yang hakiki,
yang di kurnia Allah,
kasih sayang sesama manusia itu tidak terhalang
kata erti lain, perasaan itu abstrak
kau cuma perlu tahu bagai mana nak mencorak nya
bagai mana acuaan nya,
dari Siapa perlu kita minta keredhaan,
aku belajar jodoh, ajal itu di kuasa Tuhan
kita tak dapat melawan namun dapat berusaha
untuk mendapatkan nya. soal ajal mmg tak dapat nak tolong,
itu kuasa mutlak Tuhan.
haa, ini cerita mariam, untung lah dia
punyai cinta tulus ini,
siapa tak pernah buat kesilapan, bilang aku?
tapi awal saat dia untuk terima cinta tulus ini
aku rasa bahagia bagi pihak. baguslah.
sebab aku lihat dia tempoh waktu makin yakin
dengan Tuhan, makin kuat syukur nya.
bila mana dia awal lagi
telah ditunjukkan jalan, di bentangkan pilihan
pilihan yang benar, pilihan yang suci.
dia bilang aku bila kau rasa diri kau tu
dah terlalu jauh dengan Tuhan,
jauh, sampai cahaya nur Nya pun dah tak terlihat,
kembalilah ke jalan yang satu itu.
tak ada lain, sebab Tuhan je lah tempat kita
mengadu, minta ini, minta itu.
banyak kau nak minta, tapi jarang tunduk. susah lah.
mariam yang aku kenal bukan perempuan litup sopan,
dia biasa sahaja, seperti gadis2 lain.
tapi untunglah dia punyai kekasih hati yang tulus.
aku rasa cinta mereka itu cinta tulus,
cinta kerana Allah.
kita percaya pada kuasa Tuhan.
kita tunggu apa Tuhan janjikan.
pernah dengar, orang sabar org yang paling beruntung?
:) pada aku,
perubahan tu usahlah drastik sgt,
sekadar yang mampu, sebab sedikit lama lama jadi bnyk.
dari yang kecil sehingga jitu, bulat dan padu.
aku yakin kuasa Allah.
anytime when you ready !

kau nampak gagah,
hensem, kelelakian semakin terserlah
bila semakin matang.
buat aku sayang kau lebih.
kan betul, gigi bongsu itu tanda nya
kita jadi matang,
:D

Friday, November 19, 2010

hijab part 1

1. nawaitu
2. don't wait when will you be ready (e.g. after married, after reach certain age)
3. this is the simplest, back to basic whenever you feel like stray from god
4. it usually take at least 40 days for you to feel completely comfortable wearing one
5. forcing urself to wear hijab is not really accepted, let it naturally comes from your heart
6. what ever it is, don't do because of anyone else. it's about you, yourself.
7. always hearing urself saying, "I'm not ready" when will you be ready? what if, it's too late for you to wear one? :O (R.I.P)
8. to be honest, wearing hijab is so cool. and pretty.
9. you feel down-to-earth wearing hijab. trust me.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

keiko la ni




pergi bunuh diri kalau tak kenal keiko.
we've grown up with him.
haha. free-willy 1993.
haa. bee bee,
u gedempol mcm ni laa.
keiko. comel kan kan.
weighing 3500kg. haha.
u gedempoool.

:))

ehh tak tak
i was kidding.
I'm freaking happy rite now.
:D
rindu u la
gedempol :)
we're approximately around
515.75 km to 560.6 km
apart. but in my heart.
aloh, pool sgt tak muat ni
sampai kene squeeze. :PP

I can still hold on

psst,
did you hear my heart crying?

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Selena Gomez & The Scene - A Year Without Rain



Can you feel me
When I think about you
With every breath I take
Every minute
No matter what I do
My world is an empty place

Like I've been wonderin the desert
For a thousand days ( ouhoooh )
Don't know if it's a mirage
But I always see your faaaaaaace, baby

I'm missing you so much
Can't help it, I'm in love
A day without you is like a year without rain
I need you by my side
Don't know how I will survive
A day without you is like a year without raaaaaain
Ohohouh, Wooaaah wooaah wooaah

The stars are burning
I hear your voice in my mind ( it's in my mind )
Can't you hear me calling
My heart is yearning
Like the ocean that's running dry
Catch me I'm falling

It's like the ground is crumbling underneath my feet
Won't you save me
There's gonna be a monsoon
When you get back to me
Ohhhh baabyyyy


I'm missing you so much
Can't help it, I'm in love (love)
A day without you is like a year without rain
I need you by my side (side)
Don't know how I will survive
A day without you is like a year without raaaaaain
Ohohouh, Wooaaah wooaah wooaah

So let this drought come to an end
And may this desert flower again
I'm so glad you found me
Stick around me
Baby, baby, baby, whoaa
It's a world
No wonder
With you in my life
So Hurry baby, Don't waste no more time
And I need you here
I can't explain
But a day without you
Is like a year without rain
Ohhohoh

I'm missing you so much (much)
Can't help it, I'm in love
A day without you is like a year without rain
I need you by my side (side)
Don't know how I'll survive
A day without you is like a year without rain

ehh ehh

Hoi. da lama tak YM dgn u.
sumpah I don't like skype.
those emoticons over duh. -.-'
i miss you i miss you. jom YM.
:'( cepatlaaa.

Saturday, November 13, 2010

haha.kanda kanda. :P

u make my life colourful
thank you bee bee

Friday, November 12, 2010

hee. blush blush. :$

kalau tak nak pening kepala dalam relation,
satu je. be loyal to ur partner.
how?
haha. oh aku blushing gila nak cakap kat sini,
tapi ni secret jgn cakap kuat kuat
"hari hari rasa sayang and rindu tu makin banyak"
:D
sebab awal dulu aku ada cakap,
feelings tu abstract.

It's okay, things can be settled

a short view about relationship.
what would you do if you are strongly believe
that ur partner is having an affair with someone else?
this situation is the most freak stupid thing ever happen
yet it happen in reality kan. (:
neither we want nor we expect things like this to happen.
basically, macam susah nak setel.
why? because one side tak nak confess,
and one side desperately want to know.
who's fault? haha. this is freak.
the one side tak nak confess biasa tell
"seriously baby, I dont want to break your heart by telling you bout this"
nicee.
and the one other side,is hardly do the thinking. mental break down
and hurt thus sleeping with tears every night.
the side yang tak nak confess tu, hard for dia jugak
to make a right decision, either to tell or not.
so who's fault? no one's fault?
things like this kene ada experience.
u have to learn,
the learning process in relations.

in relations, well obviously trust is important.
and communication between partners.
bila dah jadi. one side stress and one side numb,
solution is basically depends on situation.
situation macam mana tu susah nak cakap.
but either ways,
if you are seeking any evidence regarding
ur partner's disloyalty, u have to be brave.
to be able to accept all those things that
akan jadi lah dengan future.
the key is ask politely, if it doesn't work,
then silence is the best way.
humankind is very soft and fragile.
we can solve things by berbincang rite?
god creates us with the brain to think
almost perfectly the pros and cons
on our action and behavior.
no way you can shout to each other,
lay fist at others face.
fighting and having world war
is totally ridiculous.

the best is, if you think it's worth
fighting and dying for.
then you go for it.
but never quit before you win,
if winning is not on your side.
then, u have to accept it.
because god knows what best for you.
seriously.
because thing happens for a reason. (:

Thursday, November 11, 2010

it's okay.


pstt.
you know what?
if loving you is all I have, :)
"having you is more than enough"

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

comel kan kan?

cikk toing toing,
nah.
haha

half marathon

woo hoo.
this is
fantastic-extremely-not-recommended-to-do
but the fact is I'm doing it.
well well,
I tertarik with this one guy philosophy.
*gedempol lah ni*
finals ni sekali je this sem
so. I'm all out ni.
if you can, why can't I?
isn't it?
so
a half marathon completing
reading and understanding
nationhood book is
very challenging yet
I'm doing it rite now.
yes, now. reading berkali kali,
so do you think you can finish it by sunsets?
OF-COURSE. :DD

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

sweet sugar dreams


mula mula mmg pahit.
nanti sampai masa dia,
semuanya manis.
emm emm emm.
manis mcm
fairy floss okeng? :DD

seriously, I'm doing just fine

ceritera ceritera

okay.
she can't sleep.
why? thinking too much,
thinking, what had she done.
thinking, is this for real?
lord. please. say that she's in a deep sleep.
dreaming. because reality sucks.
neither complain nor nagging.
tak ada hal lah. life made easy !
biasa lah bukan selalu things go the way u plan.
she talk to herself, calming herself.
fuck la. ini hal kecik pun kau tak boleh handle?
tak apa. you have like infinity years
to spend rite?
*pretend pretend pretend*
everything okayyy.
this is honestly harddd.
seriously. she don't even know which is the hardest part.
it's either, so-fucking-hard-to-meet-each-other
or i'm-sorry-that-he-said-making-she-hurts-even-more.
hoi hoi,
listen here peeps, appreciate
others that ada sebelah you guys
dekat dengan u guys.
faham kan? (:
haihh, lama tak guna ni,
ada, adalah, tak ada, tak apa :)
sungguh
*fingers crossing*
sigh~

can we pretend that sky is always bright?

You hurting me more by saying
I'M SORRY.
It's okay.
Let's just pretend that
no one's fault,
:(

aloh. sweet nye :)

she: awak, tahu tak apa saya rasa?
he : tak tahu lah, apa dia. awak demam ke?
she: tidak lah. saya nak beritahu awak sesuatu.
he : apa dia?
she: oh oh, tak tahu lah, lepas berbulan bulan dgn awak kan. saya rasa macam baru semalam je kita bersama. macam baru semalam kenal. macam rindu tu macam kuat sangat. hari hari pun. serious. tak tipu. awak rasa takk? ada rasaa tak? ada tak? :)
he : hee, saya nak cakap. tapi tak tahu nak ckp macam mana. awak dah cakap dahulu. rasa jantung berdegup degup tunggu mesej awak tau. rindu sangat.
she: hmm. :')

Monday, November 8, 2010

hawt lah minah ni -.-

okay. seriously I'm
dyingtogetonelikeher.
-.-

Sunday, November 7, 2010

jentayu

Apabila si garuda yang angkuh itu bertindak,
Melaksanakan sumpahnya untuk memisahkan cinta kasih,
Antara putera Rom dengan puteri China,
Muncullah si jentayu yang mulia hatinya,
Mempertahankan cinta yang abadi itu.

Walau pun garuda yang perkasa itu menang,
Dalam pertarungan dengan jentayu,
Tetapi dia gagal menghalang pernikahan,
Putera Rom dengan puteri China,
Dan sekali gus gagal memisahkan,
Dua hati yang dilamun cinta.

Jentayu kalah dalam pertarungan dengan garuda yang angkuh,
Tetapi dia berjaya menyelamatkan jiwa yang penuh bersemi dengan,
Kelopak cinta.
Malu oleh sumpahannya, yang gagal,
Si garuda yang angkuh menghumbankan dirinya ke lautan kalzum.

Jentayu yang luka parah terus terbang,
Membelah awan dengan suaranya yang rawan,
Menitipkan pesan bahawa pedamaian dan keadilan,
Haruslah diperjuangkan,
Kejahatan harus dilawan dan ditentang,
Tanpa takut dan mundur.

Dan di cakerawala ini,
kebenaran akan terus bersinar,
Cinta akan tetap berbunga,
Dengan sejuta kelopaknya.

- USMAN AWANG -

:') honestly, this is awesome.
jentayu, patah sayap bertongkat paruh.

Saturday, November 6, 2010

take 5. ?

* 6 papers, & i'm done* :)


*shake all stress away*
mr. flu, please be kind :(

* hair, please grows faster*

*yuppie yup yup, she's so pretty*


*because sleeping naked is freaking fun, try it.then , you'll know*
while you are alone -.-'

*where did I put my F phone? >.<*

with love from TOMB

so, here's the thing about life.
people fuck u up, u fuck them up again.
when others are being so selfish.
u tried being selfish your own
because there is no harm doing it
when you are, yes surrounded by weird
freaking selfish people.
no, u don't share things with people that are
unwilling to share things with you.
this is life. it' about give and take.
seriously.
I live with people that are willing to
help each others. to see each others
success. not to keep those success
road and walk alone. Never was I'm thinking bout that.
but then again, yes. IF THIS IS LIFE.
and THIS IS HOW THE ENVIRONMENT.
we'll play ur game. we'll play safe.
because nothing matters now.
it's about you, yourself.
and and. thanks for poisoning me
with that kind of mentality.
see how it goes. how does it looks like
later. :D
hate to repeat this million times but that's the truth;

"absolute silence is the best way.
Say something, it can be misheard.
Misunderstood. Misinterpreted.
have it your way."

Friday, November 5, 2010

Thursday, November 4, 2010

hunnybee

perhitungan
empat kali bulan mengambang
yang membawa bahagia.
shoot. sgt skema.
HAHA.
thank you <3
asyik i love u je.
dga ni,
gua tu kalau ngak ada lu,
bisa kabut tau ngak?
haha.
muahh. gedempol sgt!

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

sunrise



okay.
next vacation
pleasee. :D
It would be freaking cool
to watch sunrise with
youu. hee.

dreaming has nothing to do with reality.

u crossed my dream last nite.
I saw u. we talked for minutes,
telling me, you had enough with her.
It's weird how I got my heart talking
"ever since u left, I miss you so much"
naaah, that's just a dream isn't it?
because nothing as good as reality.
I have mine,
I'm proud to have mine,
and he is always mine.
to be a fat guy and eventually fills up
my heart is not easy I tell you (:
p/s: the way you showed up is
F weird.
haha. funny.

have it your way

Monday, November 1, 2010

A Thousand Suns

Sitting in an empty room
Trying to forget the past
This was never meant to last,
I wish it wasn't so..

All I wanna do
Is trade this life for something new
Holding on to what i haven't got..

Wishing I had strength to stand
This is not what I had planned
It's out of my control...
-linkin park, A Thousand Suns

sejenak

kalau anak satu dua
di pulun habis,
anak dua tiga
saja di buat buat?
-.-''

twinkle twinkle little star

10 stars from the
sky above.
:D
smart

Sunday, October 31, 2010

in the state of violent mental agitation

he might forget all their sacrifices
he might just walk away wearing his pride
he might never want to keep in contact with them
he may held his fist up high in the air
pretending holding something invisible there.
he might regret all crap things that they had done to him
they probably took the wrong track for him
they probably asking TOO MUCH FROM him
where things finally became Fucked up.
he fed up about his life.
he want something new, something that could
cut off those strings that had been tied him up with them.
but he knew they are the reason why he alive.
so?
for this time around, this has nothing to do with their showground
time files so fast without no one even notices it.
believe me.
the bullshits about karma is freaking true.
nothing in life as good as karma.
he should wait for it.
he should be aware that his life is his concern.
to him,
listen here.
Absolute silence is the best way.
Say something,
it can be misheard.
Misunderstood.
Misinterpreted.
It can get you killed.

please be calm although
you might have killed them
many times in ur head. (:
that's a total satisfaction.
kill them. shoot them in the head.
stab them to death with steel knife
as many times as you want
because sometimes
fantasizing about things that
immoral is the best way reality
cannot do. because
reality is too complex.
(:
*I would be glad to thrust you in the middle of the road
and watch you being run over by a truck.
just about every bone is smashed*

Saturday, October 30, 2010

exams are like girlfriends? o.O HAHA

stay calm. but conscious

feeling stress before examinations?

What can you do to stay calm?

A. Answer the questions in the right order

If you’re taking a test where you can decide on the sequence in which you answer the questions, here’s what you should do:

1. Do the easiest question first.

2. Do the next-easiest next.

3. Do the next-easiest next.

4. Repeat as needed

B: Answer the questions. Follow Instructions

Seriously, you’d be surprised how many people aren’t following instructions or aren’t reading the questions carefully. It’s pitiful. Remember, the professor cannot give you credit for what’s not there. You must play the game in order to win.

C. Relax

No matter how much you stress, you will NEVER be able to add anything into your brain that isn’t in there already. So just accept that there might be things you don’t know, and focus on retrieving the information you DO know.

haha.
ALL THE BEST WITH UR EXAMINATION
;DD
exam is not the end of ur life.
LOL

this is y i'm freaking LOVE LP

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

but u're the only exception

If you flirt with my boy,
I'm gonna find you bitch
and I'll punch you in the face.
Wait a sec,
on second thought,
I would rather let him go,
let him be more happy with you (:
because if loving him is all that means to me.
Being happy is all I hope he'd be.

huggie

I would be happy
if you could hold me tight
:D

we're fucking teenagers

:D

angel's revenge

okay, we're cool.

okay
apa kau dapat tadi?
ada input tak?
haila wey.
patut lah blur blur.
input kosong, kau pun blur.
mana nak tahu ur own role ?
1. control overall
2. tolong control
3. cari hal pergi tembak
4. 45 darjah
5. ingat sendiri lah
haha. lawak lah weh.
seriously, its weird how u can take things
personally. no, it's not personally.
it's really a deep cut.
yes, I'm taking my time
to generate and to digest
everything.
maybe, I'm taking too much time.
too much precious time
is wasted :(
sorry.
being a soft-hearted person
is seriously fucked up man.
am not kidding you.
yes, it was my mistake. SHIT HAPPENS.
I visualized, i realized and i recognized.
haihh.

Tuesday, October 26, 2010