Selamat Hari Raya

often we wish everyone

selamat hari raya maaf zahir and batin

without really internalizing the

meaning behind the greeting.

Now days maaf zahir and batin

become annually routine

to be proclaimed in Syawal.

dear Muslims, let us together

understand the true meaning

behind those words.

:')

gratitude

I do appreciate everyone that came into my life.

Each and everyone.

thank you so much

I call it justice, not karma

Well, friends.

It's karma we've been dealing with

all the time.

manipulate it.

so it don't hit you hard (:

Karma is just a philosophy

consisting merely of ideas

that people have formulated.

It is a

"beliefs unsupported by evidence”.

it is apparently a coincidence.

Karma is an educative process.

Learn whatever needs to be learned

or harsher conditions

to drive in the lesson will arise.

Within adverse conditions

often lie the opportunity.

By maintaining

a positive attitude and energy,

you can begin to see

more good things

come into

your current karma experience.

#refer to The Noble Quran, (30:41)

I speak sarcasm language

I don't understand

why some people

cannot differentiate

between sarcasm

and compliments.

seriously, have you lost your sense?

mind blowing. really.

kelakar pun ada

rasa nak kimakk kan

kau pun ada. rasa macam

geli geli pun ada weh.

tapi tak de lah nak hina sangat.

it's your life. malas nak ambil

port. cuma bila dah proven

you are the kind,

so satisfied to know la.

happy.

funny when this friend

of mine turn up to me asking me about you.

ya Tuhan, the fact is she's having

feelings for you and that is ghreat.

tak kan lahh I nak halang

she's my friend, u get what I mean.

and there's a thinking macam

oh mai gad. should I tell her the real you

or should I let her hurting the same way

more or less like me?

oh tak, aku tak hurt langsung

malah rasa sangat bersyukur

sebab tahu mmg kita tak hold future together.

thank god. thank god. thank god.

so that's you.

that is the real casanova guy.

the one who tries every girl

you can think off. it's like,

u ada ke, tak ada u ke, I okay je.

macam you have nothing to do in my life.

that's what I should be telling you

when you first asked me last time,

"did I give you any impacts on your life?"

remember I was gahhh, y u asking me

such Q. I was out of words, not because

I am excited about what were you asking

I buried in silence because I'm not that

really much into you. -.-

*I'm in deep shit man.

I faked the answer really,

told you, "you touched my heart."

walawehh. I shouldn't do that

in the first place. so, after that shocking

moment about me friend telling me

having an affair with you,

*not shocking,it's more like predicted. haha*

tak apa lahh, go on with your niat murni

in having her with you.

I quit. it was quite a long time ago.

funny how you get caught red handed.

alamakk. life is still a long journey to go for me.

ini pasal meeting a guy yang dia rasa

oh mai I AM SO HOT

I should be chasing all the girls.

you don't impress me. I swear. haha

*mind you I am very good at faking things.

because cancerians know how to be real good

and how to be really bad, worst than SATAN.

awhh. thank god !

no wonder I can't visualize

spending my future with you.

you're just not the one.

thank god.

money can buy anything seriouslyy

where to start?

current addiction is vanilla coke.

last time I remember bicarbonate

drink is the one yang boleh buat

aku dizzy so after minum one

sure rasa mabuk pening nak muntah apa semuaa.

but it was last time la.

recently minum vanilla coke terus

sukaa and tak ada apa rasa pening pun.

mungkin dah akil baligh?

haha.*tak masuk akal.

ya Tuhann, panjang nyaa intro.

aku nak tulis benda lain

sebenarnyaa. well, I'm currently

working at this one apparel boutique.

working is not an easy job.

it's nothing to be playing around.

yes, I go there to spend my whole

school holidays and others of course

to shake my ass for the pay.

tengok staff lain work their best

earning monthly payy to sara anak and family

really touched me a lot. well, of course

bila dah akil baligh ni laa baru think straight.

bukan duk g kerja lepak lepak, buang masa.

tahu lahh, gaji pun bukan berapa sgt weh

sebulan tu haaa. nak bayar rumah, kereta,

anak makan pakai minumm, gila wehh

banyak duit nak pakai serious.

oh oh, Fuck my life. sedang aku menulis post ini

jiwa dikacau dengan lonjakan hati untuk

menulis satu lagi post lain yang

seronok ronok lahhh. hahaha.

#iklan sekejap.

let me finish with this one first. mati lah

esok kerja full mesti mengantuk.

HAHA. biarlah -.-'

tak ada apa pun aku nak cakap

sebenarnay cari duit ni

bukan mudah, as parents lagi sakit

ohmai. bila cakap pasal gaji besar

and apa tu haaaaa emm

perancangan money, it is a serious matter.

because how high you ada pay,

if you don't know how to

use your money wisely and ber budget

sure thing duit bnyk pun rasa tak cukup.

haihhh. this is a reminder for me

myself and for everyone out there :)

I seriouslyy need to start saving for kahwin

dan sebagainyaa. -..- haha

tolong tolong ingatkan saya ok folks? :B

thanks :D

cancerians

I am a

typical and predicted

and strongly possessed all those

characters of

cancer.

I'm growing too fast.

mom, do you miss me?

do you missed how I used to be?

do you missed every single time

I asked you for the botol susu?

do you miss sleeping beside me

playing with my hair, kissing me

silently while I sleep?

mom, it kills me too knowing I am a big girl now.

I just can't be the old me.

the one who still holding botol susu

everywhere I go, crying every single day

don't want to go to kindergarten.

I knoww deep inside you miss me

roight? don't denyy me.

I am sorry if I am such failure to you :'(

I love you so much, mak.

no wonder you just

smiling when our little

brother saying that,

anis kan anak kesayangan mak.

hmm

no one cares. I don't care a shit either.

being emotional roight noww.

ahh. stress lah.

fahamm tak apa perasaan kau orang

bila parents kau orang treat korang

macam budak budak.

okay for the record semuaa should knoww

mostly apa yang aku buat semuaa

based on parents punya decision :(

so, tolak tambah diorang selalu cakap

I'm not big enough to berdikari.

tak bukan aku nak salah kan parents

hundred percent dalam hal ni.

and yes, it's absolute bout my own self.

the way I make every decision,

things that should make my parents

trust me, well at least give me a chance to

make my own decision & to be

responsible on every decision made.

kalau diorang tak trust aku.

siapa lagi? diri sendiri lah kan?

I have a low self esteem bila borak

pasal family, pasal parents,

pasal siblings. I don't even want to

talk about it either.

why try so hard when no one listens ?

aku pun dah malas nak entertain semuaa orang,

nak impressed semua orang.

aku penat lah. sumpah penat :'(

I've got nothing to impress. No one cares.

even my parents don't care. so?

I am much more handsome than you :)

hello handsome.

it's kind of heart-beat-skipping

whenever I get a text or a call

from youu. you excite me much.

you should know that missing

you is something out of my control.

and thinking about holding a future

together is another out of our sense thingy.

I knoww

oh well, things happened :)

yeah, missing you here.

sunshine.

I was once a gay

having a same sex

relationship is nothing

more or less compared with

men-women love stories.

same sex basically think that

they do not produce offspring

and easy to care each other

based on the mentality of knowing

much more better each other needs.

some common reason why they

become one is basically dumped

from previous normal relationship.

others, family background, education

and et cetera.

I don't have rights to comment on

their behavior. I don't have any

to point out that this and that is haram.

This is an open stuff everyone knows

being gay is wayy against morality.

We still need to respect each other

because of the humanity.

I have nothing to say you seriously need God

you need faith and you need consistency.

change for better :)

you lose nothing, trust me.

irritating. they really are.

should I go like,

ohmaii gawddd ! I just coloured my hair

and I'm fucking love it.

*sounds fucking pathetic

yeaa I know. haha.

intro macam gampang.

so here I am

with a longg time not writing

anyy kat bloggie ni haa.

I really want to make a list.

things irritate me most:

1) a person captured his/her own pic using own camera or handphone looking like a twat. (taking own snapp) seriouslyy I don't have to give you an example on what I meant here roight. haha

2) a guy pathetically showing off by uploading his NEW girlfriend pics with a kissing picture and such. mann, it freakingg ugly. seriously -.-

3) a person yang BARU 2-3mins kenal tegur bagai nak rak, like you know me since I'm a kid brahh. like we used to play pondok pondok or guli sama samaa. take it sloww brahh, I do not like harsh people menggelabah and bajet lu cool. haha

4) a person yang suka judge orang lain. eventhou I'm doing it sometimes. but don't go to far laaa. kalau orang tu ada buat taik dgn youu baru lah you balas balik. haha. *do not interfere other's life when you got nothing to deal with. unless you want to be known as useless cuntbag. go ahead brahh.

5) people who wake me up early morning shouting like a crazy person. come onnn don't you know it is very important to have a very good startup day? seriously I feel like pushing you off the cliff you twat.

that's all I can think of

roight now. nanti ada lagi wa

tambah.

tapi kan weh, haa. this is only

feelings. mcm mana

kitaa nak buat dia jadi

positive vibes is that we look

at all the irritating thingy

as something yang alah,

kimak betul ni benda kecik je weh.

HAHA.

tapi sumpah irritating

rasaa nak gigit kaca sampai patah gigi.

*okayy merapu bye !

hantaran jang oi !

*click for Fucking enlargement

NAMPAK KE TAK?

haaaa. haha.

kalau dah ready,

ada empat ketul tu

u dtg je rumah,

i okay je.

cakap dgn mama i,

then kita kawin laa.

haha.

#ada ke? forever alone ahh aku mcm ni

T_T HAHA

is that too much? :O

where facebook has been a medium

to interact with all friends,

twitter to tweet your current emo,

bloggie that contains vast emotions,

and lookbook has been unintended

in the absence of nice camera

plus formspring that so outdated

and tumblr where you can sooth

you feelings with nice pictures.

that's a lot brahh. we are

so-called-internet-generation.

:B

a soldier

every movie that

relates to a soldier

reminds me much

about you.

about how am I

used to be owned

by a charming soldier.

but life has to move on.

he choose to leave me.

to be on his own.

to fight for the country,

leaving me to

another great man.

that can treat me right.

that can be by myside

always.

just always.

pretty inside out

she is very pretty.

not like me.

she is amazing dashing

and everything about

her is fantastic.

whyy can't I be

pretty like her?

why can't I be as

awesome as her.

she has a very beautiful

soul. she's gorgeous.

hello girls,

listen closely,

if you are too busy

comparing yourself

with others, you'll

forget how beautiful

you are. how amazing you are.

be grateful for life

is something that

meaningful and you

can't waste even a sec

of it. be grateful

life as we know it

I really don't mind being

all alone by myself.

I really don't care if

I have to walk and to

stand alone in this world.

when you can be on your own feet,

why expect others to lend you

a helping hand and make you

stand up?

be strong. be tough.

excepting the truth that

we are all dealing with the same thing,

life :)

Rihanna - Man Down

"Man Down"

I didn't mean to end his life
I know it wasn't right
I can't even sleep at night
Can't get it off my mind
I need to get out of sight
Before I end up behind bars

What started out as a simple altercation
Turned into a real sticky situation
Me just thinking on the time that I'm facing
Makes me wanna cry

Cause I didn't mean to hurt him
Could've been somebody's son
And I took his heart when
I pulled out that gun

Rum pum pum rum pum pum pum rum pum pum pum
Man Down
Rum bum bum bum rum bum bum bum rum bum bum bum
Man Down

Oh mama mama mama
I just shot a man down
In central station
In front of a big ol crowd
Oh Why Oh Why
Oh mama mama mama
I just shot a man down
In central station

It's a 22
I Call her Peggy Sue
When she fits right down in my shoes
What do you expect me to do
If you're playing me for a fool
I will lose my cool
And reach for my fire arm

I didn't mean to lay him down
But it's too late to turn back now
Don't know what I was thinking
Now he's no longer living
So I'm bout to leave town

Cause I didn't mean to hurt him
Could've been somebody's son
And I took his heart when
I pulled out that gun

Rum bum bum bum rum bum bum bum rum bum bum bum
Man Down
Rum bum bum bum rum bum bum bum rum bum bum bum
Man Down

Oh mama mama mama
I just shot a man down
In central station
In front of a big ol crowd
Oh Why Oh Why
Oh mama mama mama
I just shot a man down
In central station

Look I never thought I'd do it
Never thought I'd do it
Never thought I'd do it
Oh gosh
What ever happened to me
Ever happened to me
Ever happened to me
Why did I pull the trigger
Pull the trigger pull the trigger BOOM
And end a nigga end a niggas life so soon
When mi pull the trigger pull the trigger pull it pon you
Somebody tell me what I'm gonna what I'm gonna do

Rum bum bum bum rum bum bum bum rum bum bum bum
Mi say wah man down (A weh mi say)
Rum bum bum bum rum bum bum bumm rum bum bum bum
When mi went downtown

Cause now I am a criminal criminal criminal
Oh lord a mercy now I am a criminal
Man Down
Tell the judge please gimme minimal
Run out a town none a dem cah see mi now

Oh mama mama mama
I just shot a man down
In central station
In front of a big ol crowd
Oh Why Oh Why
Oh mama mama mama
I just shot a man down
In central station

awesomee

:/

homai.

I miss you.

seriouslyyy

malas pun bolehh :B

I nak text you,

tapi ada feelings tu

macam I mengganggu you sgt2

eventhou you've said

text doesn't bother

you at all.

tapi serious I rasa macam

hamaigadd tak penting

tak payah text lah.

*malas sebenarnya*

haha

I remember you questioned me,

bolehh eh malas?

apa tak boleh? meh habaq sat pasaipa x boleh?

haha

mixed blood

clarification.

for having a mixed-blood,

people always confused about you.

mula mula tu you mesti lah

making that weird pathetic face,

like, watafak mann? O_o

thenn slowly

you get used with others Q

'you don't look like malay lah, are you?'

'you don't look like local people'

'are you from outside?'

dik, are you local?

homai do I look like oreng putih?

haa ini paling tak boleh blah

rasa nak kembang kan hidung

sampai minggu depan.

tolong lah faham,

I ada mixed blood within the nations je

tapi tak ada lah sampai

muka macam kajol,

asal usul arab,

muka iras jennifer garner*muntah*,

haha.

penat dah layan orang tanya tanya

kadang kadang aku sembur je

pak, saya orang indon :B HAHA

well the fact is yeaa i ada origin sana.

pueh hati? pueh dak? -..-

texting is just not my type

I'm not a text person.

I prefer chat on the phone

rather than hurting my

thumb texting you.

yes yes, I am lazy fat ass bum bum

well somehow listening to your voice really

makes me calm :)

it's kind of therapy :)

blissful feeling

macam mana kalau

kauorang boleh

imagine live your whole

life with one particular

person?

:)

mesti best kan oi?

sama kan? -..-

we share the same

cheek bonee

*pengsannn* haha

selfishness

ada masa kau kene stand up untuk diri sendiri

fikir apa yang sangat penting dalam hidup.

kalau perlu penting kan diri sendiri

buatlah. untuk kebaikan diri kita sendiri.

sampai bila nak jaga hati orang kalau sendiri asik hurt? :)

Awesomee :)

Being single used to mean that nobody wanted you.

Now it means you're pretty sexy

and you're taking your time

deciding how you want your life to be

and who you want to spend it with.

- Sex and the City

vacation it is

the only thing

that's on my mind

is vacation.

to a peace and nice

place. I want to escape

well at least feww days

from the ordinary.

take me awayyy :)

wordless wednesdayy

I really not into current
trend of many bloggers
about those wordless wednesday
why?
because If you have something
in your mind and you're going
to spill it out, wouldn't it
be so stressful wednesday
cause you can't said a thing.
:D well, logically.

recently I was to busy
searching for my passport.
gawd, if I lost mine, can u imagine
kene pergi report polis,
(infact aku dah ready nak go report
mana lah tahu boleh usha pakcik polis)
kehkeh. tak tak, apa i nak cakap is
penat la, malas pergi report2 tu haa.
ingat aku rajin sgt nak g mereport?
lepas tu pergi misplaced kan passport
lepas tu susahkan orang, lepas tu
tak reti jaga harta sendiri
potpetpotpet kene bebel dgn mak. jyeah !

apa pun kauorang tolong lah faham

aku eksited sgt jumpa passport

semulaaaa. KOH SAMUI oi !

haha. can't F wait -.-'

:)

raya seorang diri kali ini

kalau tahun lepas raya berdua

tahunn ini raya seorang.

rindu lah nak raya samaa samaa.

ah, mengarut lah

raya sensorg lagi best.

tak ada nak fikir orang lain.

hoyeahh ! :D

berpuasa

kalau kau bodoh agama

kurang amal ibadah

cetek ilmu ketuhanan

pegang lah yang satu

buat lah yang termampu

ikhlas itu perlu

you look hot when

you wish me selamat berpuasa

it just so not you,

cause that you look gorgeous handsome.